Uhf Page #6

One day he was shootin'

Old Jed was shootin' at some food

When all of a sudden right up from the ground, there

Well, there came a bubblin' crude

Oil that is Well, maybe you call it black gold or Texas tea

He gonna move next to Mr. Drysdale And be a Beverly hillbilly...

Before you know it, all the kinfolk are-a-sayin'

Yeah, buddie, move away from there

That little Clampet got his own cement pond

That little Clampet, he's a millionaire

Now, everyone said Californie

Is the place that you oughta be

We got to load up this here truck now

We got to move to Beverly

Hills, that is

Swimming pools

Move-a-move-a-movie stars

Lookit that, lookit that

Beverly Beverly Beverly hillbillies

Y'all come back now, y'hear?

Beverly Beverly Beverly hillbillies

George... hey, George...

I finished polishing all the doorknobs.

Is there anything else you want me to do?

Uh, no, Stanley... that's ok.

It's getting pretty late.

Why don't you call it a night?

Aw... do I have to?

Yeah. Go on. I'll see you in the morning.

Okay, I'll see ya.

Hey, George. You know, I was just wondering...

like, like, if you were travelling through outer space.

I mean like going real fast like the speed of light you know,

and all of a sudden you started screaming...

you think that you're brain would blow up?

Hey, guys, I'm trying to work here, do you mind?

No... no, I don't mind, go right ahead.

Do you mind, George?

Would you care to order now?

Oh yah, I'll have the

No, thank you. We'll wait.

Are you sure he knows what restaurant we're at?

Well... I've got some good news and some bad news.

Okay... gimme the bad news first.

Well, given our present financial situation,

compounded by on-going fixed expenses and outstanding invoices,

I figure this station will be flat broke by the end of the week.

What's the good news?

I lied. There is no good news.

I never should have taken this job.

I should have known it would turn out like all the others.

You know, for a short time there,

I just don't know anymore.

Well, at least I've still got Teri.

Bob, what time is it?

Nine thirty.

Oh no...

Hello?

George Newman... you're a selfish, thoughtless, insensitive creep.

And from now on you can forget all my birthdays... because we're through

Hey, kids... where do you want to go?

That's right. To Uncle Nutzy's Clubhouse.

And boy oh boy are we gonna have big fun today.

We're gonna have so much fun...

we'll forget about how miserable we are

and how much life sucks and how

we're all going to grow old and die someday.

I wanna go home.

Shut up, you little weasel.

Okay, right now I'd like to show you one of my favorite cartoons.

It's a sad, depressing story about a pathetic coyote

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