True Confession Page #4

boyfriend, Mr.- M-Mr. McCormack?

McDugal.

Oh, yes, Mr. McDugal.

Why did he run out of here?

Oh, I told you.

He ate some bad, uh,

lettuce once, and it-

Someday, right in the middle of one of your lies,

I'm gonna put on my hat and walk out that door.

I'm going to walk

all the way to China.

Who was that man? Well,just because

Daisy brings her boyfriend over,

a crazy boyfriend that-

that she met in her office, I-

At school.

That's what I meant.

All right. He came to take the typewriter

away, and I didn't want him to take it.

And so what did you do?

Well, I told him that you thought

the typewriter was your baby,

and if he took it,

you'd kill him.

In other words,

you told him I was crazy.

Well, yes.

See? Now I've told you the truth,

and you're mad.

I'm not angry. I was just thinking

I could wring your neck, that's all.

I don't blame you. I didn't mean to

tell him that. It just popped out.

As usual. Like the time

I walked into the room...

and discovered you'd told people

I was a reformed bank robber.

That was only because all the other

women were bragging about their husbands-

And that time I met the Ralstons

on the street after you'd told them...

we couldn't play bridge because

I was in the hospital with kidney trouble.

Well, you know we can't

play bridge at all well together.

And that butcher

- the day he saw me after he'd canceled

our meat bill because you told him I was dead.

Get mad at me.

Let's have it over.

Oh, what's the use?

I've done that.

I'm living a nightmare, th-the

darnedest nightmare a man ever lived.

And someday, uh-

Can you reach the cigarettes?

Ken, I wouldn't have had to tell

the typewriter man you were crazy...

if- if I'd had the money

to pay him.

Thanks.

Oh, I don't mean it's your fault.

I mean if you'd only

let me go out and get a job.

I'm taking care of you. A lot of wives work

- even millionaires' wives.

Oh, but that's different.

They work because they're bored,

and not as a signal to the rest of the

worid that their husbands need help.

If you went to work, I'd be a confessed

failure, and I'm not that... yet.

Huh, of course you're not.

I mean if I had a job secretly.

You know what I'd do if you went

out and got a job behind my back?

Yes.

Are you going to try it?

No.

Are you telling the truth?

Yes.

Ken, from now on, I'm gonna

tell the truth, so help me.

I'm going to be proud of you

for what you represent,

and I'm gonna manage on our budget

and have money to spare too.

Good morning, madame. Good morning.

I'm Mr. Krayler's new secretary.

Very good.

Very good indeed.

This way, please.

Do you wish breakfasts?

No. Am I supposed to eat here?

Do you wish to go to the office first,

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