Topsy-Turvy Page #3
- Ah. | - More dramatic.
And that is to be your work | whilst you're away?
That... and only that.
Will there be room for Mr Gilbert | in your baggage?
Certainly not. He's far too large.
Food for thought.
Ce n'est pas moi de dire.
Indeed not.
Which train will you catch?
The tidal train.
Up at seven.
Arriver Paris 3:
30?peu prs.
How will you spend | your first night of liberty?
I shall take some exercise.
Hmm!
La poupe de Paris, alors!
# Les oiseaux
# Dans la charmille
C'est mouvant!
Whoo!
Allez, battez!
C'est mes cuisses!
Plus de cuisses!
Whoo!
Comment vous appelez-vous?
Voil Mademoiselle Fromage, monsieur.
Oui, c'est vrai.
Quelle sorte de fromage?
Peut-tre un fromage suisse?
Oui, oui!
Avec des petits trous?
Si je peux vous embrasser...
Et vous aussi.
# This helmet I suppose
# Was meant to ward off blows
# It's very hot and weighs a lot
# As many a guardsman knows
# As many a guardsman knows
# As many a guardsman knows
# As many a guardsman knows
# So off
# So off that helmet goes
# Yes, yes, yes!
# So off that helmet goes
# This tight-fitting cuirass
# Is but a useless mass
# It's made of steel and weighs a deal
# This tight-fitting cuirass
# Is but a useless mass
# A man is but an ass
# Who fights in a cuirass
# So off
# So off goes that cuirass
# Yes, yes, yes
# So off goes that cuirass
# Behold!
My voice. | My voice - I've strained my voice.
I've been trying too hard.
The smaller the house, | the greater the effort.
I'm very cross with myself. | I should know better.
One's knocking one's pipes out | in a vain attempt to elicit a response...
...from three colonial bishops, two elderly | ladies and an intoxicated costermonger!
They're roasting in their own lard, | like the Christmas goose.
And the costermonger left at the interval.
- Did he? | - Mm.
Ha! A man of infinite taste. Clearly!
Will you take a wee gargle | of my salt water?
No, thank you. | It would put me in mind of my boyhood.
Mm. Do forgive me.
Not at all.
I fear that dear Mr Gilbert | has run out of ideas.
- No. | - He doesn't know what to do with me!
Ponder this.
He thrusts me into | tight-fitting pots and pails...
...and poaches me | like a f***ing haddock!
Forgive my Anglo-Saxon, Mr Butt. | Have a biscuit.
Thank you, sir. | I'll take one 'ome with me for me supper.
Dickie, it's just this heat.
It addles the noodles. | It happened to me in Milan frequently.
Ah, Milano. Bellissimo.
The heat less hellish.
I am humiliated.
One might as well be in the chorus.
Away wi' you, you wee monkey!
Alas, no!
The reign of the Emperor Gilbert | is all but at an end.
I consider this to be his best piece so far.
With all due respect, Durward, | your romantic opinion may be informed...
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"Topsy-Turvy" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/topsy-turvy_22105>.
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