Top Hat

I beg your pardon.

Good evening.

- Good evening.

- Good evening, Mr. Hardwick.

- Has Mr. Jerry Travers come in yet?

- Yes, sir.

He's been waiting for you

the entire evening, sir.

The entire evening? Oh, dear.

Thanks.

Begging your pardon, sir.

But is that the Mr. Travers,

the well-known American gentleman, sir?

It is indeed.

He's come over to star in my show.

It's his first London appearance.

Your show, Mr. Hardwick?

I'm producing it.

But I don't want

any of the members here to know.

I want to surprise them.

I'm sure they'll be surprised,

Mr. Hardwick.

Hello, Jerry. I'm sorry I kept you waiting.

Jerry, there are a lot of things

that I have to discuss.

So I want you to come over

to my hotel now.

What happened?

Jerry, I forgot to tell you.

I want you to stay here for the night.

I'm sorry, I can't do it.

But you must, old man, really.

You see, at the moment, I'm having

a sort of a problem with my valet.

What do you want me to do,

press your pants?

No. You wouldn't know how.

No, you don't understand.

It's my man, Bates.

- We've had a bit of a tiff.

- How terrible.

- You didn't come to blows or anything?

- Nothing like that.

We're not speaking to each other.

We've had rather a clash of taste.

You see, Bates insists that a square tie...

is the only possible tie

that can be worn with evening clothes.

A square tie, imagine.

I prefer the butterfly.

- I think Bates is right.

- Bates is never right.

- Well, then why don't you fire him?

- That's a little difficult.

I'm hoping against hope

that the man will just disappear.

I hate to interfere

in these little family squabbles.

But let's hope he'll approve of me.

There's never any telling with Bates.

There you are.

If you please.

- Good evening, sir.

- Good evening.

Allow us to introduce ourselves, sir.

We are Bates, sir.

Really?

- We are Jerry Travers.

- Welcome to our mnage.

Thank you, Bates.

It seems that I'm to stay here tonight.

At least that was the idea

of our beloved impresario.

Whose idea?

Mr. Hardwick's.

His idea.

Welcome anyhow.

Thank you, Bates.

Pardon, sir, but may we make

a personal observation?

- Not too personal.

- No, sir.

It's merely that we feel impelled

to compliment you, sir...

upon your excellent taste in ties.

- They like me.

- You never know.

Where on earth did you ever find him?

From the Salvation Army,

as a matter of fact.

I sent them a pair of very old shoes.

I see. And the shoes came back

and Bates was in them.

And he's been wearing

my good ones ever since.

- How's Madge feeling?

- She's fine. Thanks, Jerry.

The climate at the Lido

has done her a lot of good.

That's fine. Too bad she won't be here

for the opening tomorrow night.

Isn't it? She's heartbroken, really.

However, she's expecting us to fly down

to Italy for a weekend.

Fly down to Italy for a weekend?

I can't. I haven't got any goggles.

My word, Jerry, you'll have to go.

She's counting on us.

She's going to have

a young friend visit her.

I suspect there's something in the air.

You know Madge

and her matchmaking proclivities.

Is she expecting me

for a weekend or a wedding?

You can't tell. You know how wives are.

No, I don't. How are they?

Wives? They always have a little scheme.

Look here, I think it's about time

you found out for yourself.

- You do?

- I certainly do.

No, thanks, Horace.

In me you see a youth

who's completely on the loose.

No yens, no yearning.

Hello. This is Miss Tremont.

I'd like to speak

to the manager immediately.

Hello. Are you there?

Who? The manager. Yes.

I can't hear a word you're saying.

There's a young lady downstairs.

A young lady. At this time of night?

She can't come up here now.

No, I'd better come down myself.

Jerry, go right ahead.

A young lady downstairs

evidently wants to see me.

Hello.

Won't you come in?

I'm awfully glad you dropped in.

I dropped up from the room below,

where I've been trying to get some sleep.

I'm sorry.

I didn't realize I was disturbing you.

You see, every once in a while,

I suddenly find myself...

dancing.

I suppose it's some kind of an affliction?

Yes, it's an affliction.

St. Vitus' dance.

And it only occurs at this time of night?

Yes, that's it.

It only occurs at this time of night.

As a matter of fact,

I really shouldn't be left alone.

Yes, I can see that.

You probably should have

a couple of guards.

I think you're very unkind

to make fun of me.

I'm sorry.

- I wish you wouldn't leave.

- Why not?

I think I feel an attack coming on.

See, there it is.

So I see.

There's only one thing that'll stop me.

You must tell me what it is.

My nurses always

put their arms around me.

I'll call the house detective

and tell him to put his arms around you.

Good night.

What are you doing here?

What are you carrying that for?

- Who was the young lady?

- What young lady?

That call wasn't for me. It was for you.

Somebody has registered a complaint.

I know. I've just seen the complaint.

She's lovely, she's delightful,

she's charming, and she wants to sleep.

She does?

And I'm going to help her,

and you're going to help me. Take this.

No, bring it in here

and guard it with your life.

- What are you going to do?

- Never mind.

Look here, what's the idea?

The young lady downstairs wants to sleep.

So you told me.

I've appointed myself her official sandman.

But, Jerry...

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