Three Men in a Boat

Synopsis: One hot June day, three friends decide there is nothing they would like to do more than to get away from London. A boating holiday with lots of fresh air and exercise would be just the very thing, or so their doctors tell them. So, after debating the merits of hotel or camp beds and what to pack, they set off on their voyage - a trip up the Thames from Henley to Oxford - but very quickly find themselves ill-equipped for the trials of riverbank life.
Genre: Comedy, Drama
 
IMDB:
7.3
Year:
1975
64 min
84 Views

JEROME:
The chief beauty of this work

lies not so much in its style,

or in the extent and usefulness

of the information it conveys,

as in its simple truthfulness.

It forms a record of events

that really happened.

Other works may excel this

in depth of thought

and knowledge of human nature,

but for hopeless and incurable veracity,

nothing yet discovered can surpass it.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

There were four of us.

George and William Samuel Harris

and myself and Montmorency.

We were sitting in my room, smoking

and talking about how bad we were.

Bad from a medical point of view,

I mean, of course.

With me, it's giddiness.

- It's giddiness with me, too.

- Hmm.

Sometimes I have such extraordinary

fits of giddiness,

- I hardly know what I'm doing.

- I hardly know what I'm doing, too,

I have such extraordinary

fits of giddiness.

With me, it's my liver

that's out of order.

Oh, how do you know?

Well, I've been reading this patent

liver-pill circular which sets out

the various symptoms by which a man

can tell when his liver is out of order.

I have them all,

including what it calls "a general

disinclination to work of any kind".

I've got that, too.

I've been a martyr to it

since earliest boyhood.

- I was born with it.

- They didn't know it was my liver.

Course, medical science was in

a far less advanced state than now.

They used to give me a clump

on the side of the head.

- Didn't do any good.

- My whole body, you know...

We sat there describing to each other

our maladies.

I explained to George and Harris

how I felt when I got up in the morning.

And Harris told us how he felt

when he went to bed.

And George stood on the hearth rug

and gave us a clever and powerful

piece of acting,

illustrative of how he felt

in the night.

George fancies he is ill,

but there's never anything

really the matter with him.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Mrs Poppets.

(EXHALING) Supper?

I suppose one should try.

A cousin of mine who

is usually described on the charge-sheet

as a medical student once told me

that something in the stomach

often keeps disease in check.

Steak and onions, and rhubarb pie.

Hmm.

What we need is a rest.

Rest and a complete change.

Leave the 19th century behind,

seek out some quaint, forgotten nook.

Far from the madding crowd,

half as old as time.

- What we need is a sea trip.

- No, no, no.

- I remember once...

- Not now, old chap.

Why don't we go up the river?

Fresh air, the changing scene

will occupy our minds,

including what there is of Harris'.

And the exercise

will make us sleep well.

I agree.

I think it a very sensible idea.

It just goes to show

that you should never write off a man

Just because he's never had

a sensible idea before.

- I propose.

- Second.

- Aye.

- Any against?

(LOW GROWL)

Carried by three to one.

JEROME:
The Thames,

couched in that green and golden valley,

winding and whispering, singing of

strange old tales and secrets

as it flows under the fair canopy of

England sky through England's history.

Our little boat, borne along

on sun-dappled waters,

through shady woods

and blazing fields...

HARRIS:
How about when it rains?

JEROME:
(SIGHING)

That's Harris all over.

When George is hanged, Harris will be

the least romantic man in the world.

We had arranged that George,

who goes to sleep at a bank

from 10 till four every day

except Saturday,

when they wake him up

and put him outside at two,

would join us when we got up the river

to Shepperton.

Meanwhile, Harris and I

and the Gladstone

and the small handbag and the

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Jerome K. Jerome

Jerome Klapka Jerome (2 May 1859 – 14 June 1927) was an English writer and humorist, best known for the comic travelogue Three Men in a Boat (1889). Other works include the essay collections Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow (1886) and Second Thoughts of an Idle Fellow; Three Men on the Bummel, a sequel to Three Men in a Boat, and several other novels. more…

All Jerome K. Jerome scripts | Jerome K. Jerome Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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