The Zoot Cat

Synopsis: Tom's advances on a young jive-talking girl cat get nowhere; nowhere, that is, until Tom gets a zoot suit. Armed with his miles of fabric and a new cool lingo, Tom still has to deal with the tricks of his nemesis, Jerry. Solid, Jackson!
7 min


Hey, toots!

Uh... What's cooking, toots?


Boy, are you corny.

You act like a square at the fair,

a goon from Saskatoon.

You come on like a broken arm.

You're a sad apple, a long hair,

a cornhusker.

In other words, you don't send me.

So bail out, brother. Get lost.

And here's your rat, cat.


Boy, are you corny.

How many times have

you been told that?

How many girls have said, "No, Horace,

I can only be a sister to you."

Get your boots laced, buddy.

Get hep to the jive.

Step in and see smiling Sam,

the zoot suit man.

Step out with a zoot suit,

with a drape shape...

...and a reet pleat. Wear an ankle

length jacket with 3-foot shoulders...

...pants that begin at the chin,

zoom to a 54-inch knee...

...then fade softly to a 3-inch

victory cuff.

Get hep. Get one.

Get lost in a new zoot suit.

- Jackson!

- What's jumping, chick?

You're really a sharp character!

A mellow little fellow.

Now you collar my jive.

You're on the right side,

you alligator, you.

Slip me some skin, my friend.

Well, all reet. Well, all root.

Well, all right.

Let's dig a little righteous jive.

Do you hear me?

Latch on, Jackson.

We're off.



I love you.

When I'm with you,

I'm what you call a hep cat.

I am hep to the jive.

I'm in the groove, darling.

Now you're

really sending me, Jackson.

You set my soul on fire.

It is not just a little spark.

It is a flame...

...a big roaring flame.

I can feel it now.

It is burning...

...burning, burning.

Say, something is burning

around here.




[English - US - SDH]

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Mark S. Bernthal

Mark S. Bernthal is a writer who wrote all of the Barney Home Videos. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "The Zoot Cat" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 27 Oct. 2020. <>.

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