The Ups and Downs of a Handyman Page #4

Disgraceful.

Thank goodness we haven't anybody

like her in the village.

- Yes, yes, all right Fred, that's fine,

now come on, come on,

out, out, out.

Fred, the book please unless

you're keeping it for evidence.

- Oh, I don't want this filth.

- How would you like me?

- (laughs) Well,

I thought I'd like to take

a nice art study.

- Oh, all right.

- I'll get ready.

(manic comical music)

There you are, Arthur,

now you fix the lights.

- The lights, yes, fix the

lights, uh, oh yes.

Ohh!

(manic comical music)

- Now what?

How's that?

- Perhaps another button?

- Oh, Arthur, you are a naughty man.

(both laugh)

- And, uh, perhaps a little leg?

- How's that?

- Well, now, I wonder, do you think we,

could we be a little more daring?

- How do you mean?

- Could you take your skirt off?

- All right, but you turn your back first.

- All right.

- You may turn around now.

Is this all right?

- It's wonderful.

- Well, when are you going

to take a photo?

- I've got to get everything right.

There's an art in taking

a good photograph.

Oh, oh.

- Well, I'm sure you know best.

- That's right my dear.

- Are you ready now?

Well, what do you think?

- Uh, I'm not sure.

- Well, suppose I took my blouse off.

- Yes, yes, I think that would work.

- Think you're ready now?

- I'll have a look.

- Well, Arthur?

- I'm still not happy.

- Well, what do you think

I should do?

- What do you think?

- Well, perhaps I should

take everything off.

- That would help,

yes, yes, that would be it.

- All right.

(manic comical music)

- That's it, that's it.

I'm ready, I'm ready!

- Hang on, Arthur.

You need this to flash with.

(flash blows up)

(cows mooing)

- Hello.

Are you looking for something?

- Uh, yeah, Elgin farm, love?

I've been chasin' around

all over the place,

but there are no sign

posts or anything.

- Well, I think you've, uh,

found what you're looking for,

haven't you?

Or haven't you?

- I beg your pardon?

- Elgin Farm, that's what

you're looking for, isn't it?

- Uh, yeah, that's right,

I'm a bit late already.

- Hmm, you must be the new handyman.

- That's right, yeah.

- I bet Mummy can't wait to meet you.

- Come on, I'll show you.

- No, no, hang on there.

Don't you think you'd

better get dressed first?

- What's the matter, don't

you like me the way I am?

- Oh, yeah, yeah, nice.

But, uh, well, uh, it's just

I don't think you're mother

would like me turning up with

you dressed like that, do you?

- Mmm, maybe you're right, she

is a bit of an old dragon.

- Hang on, don't I need my tools?

- Your tools, I suppose you

can't do anything

without them, can you?

- Oh.

- Right, here you are,

then, this is the barn

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