The Suicide Shop

Synopsis: A family-run shop that sells everything you need to take your own life finds it hard to focus on business after a new baby -- one who makes everyone around him happy -- is born into the family.
Director(s): Patrice Leconte
Production: ARP Sélection
  2 nominations.
Rotten Tomatoes:
79 min

- There's joy

Hello, hello, swallows

There's joy

In the sky

Over the roofs

There's joy

And sun in the little streets

There's joy, everywhere there's joy

All day long my heart beats,

capsizes and staggers

It's love

That comes with whatever

It's love, hello hello

ladies, there's joy

Everywhere there is joy

The baker kneads

the dough with both arms

He makes good bread

so fine that I am hungry

We see the mailman flying over there

Like a blue angel

Bringing his letters to God

Miracle without a name

At station Javel

We see the subway

Coming out of its tunnel

Drunk with sun, songs,

And flowers...

It runs toward the woods

It runs at full steam

There's joy, the Eiffel tower

goes for a walk

Like a mad woman she jumps over

the Seine, then she says

"Too bad for me

if I get sick"

I was bored all alone

In my corner"

There's joy...

the taxman put on his vest

Closes shop and says

in a very very kind way

Hello, for today the collect

is over, keep it all gentlemen.

But suddenly I wake up

In my bed,

So, I was dreaming

for sure as the sky is gray

I must get up,

wash up

Get dressed

And not sing

If you have nothing to say

But I still believe

That this dream is good

As it let me make a song.

Song of Spring

Song of love

Song for 20 years old

Song for always

There is joy...

The Suicide Shop

- What happened to you?

You wanted to commit suicide? Right?

Well yes, of course.

- Don't you know it's forbidden?

- What? It's forbidden to commit suicide?

Yes, on the public roads.

Everybody knows that.

- I did not know. Sorry.

- Luckily the cop didn't see it.

You would have been fined.

And it's not a small fine.

I can tell you.

- What do I care

if I'm dead.

- What are you thinking?

They would have gone after your family.

- They couldn't.

I have no family left.

And if you miss?

What do you get?

A fine and a wheelchair.

You get the picture?

- What do you propose then?

- Shh...

Follow me.


With the crisis, which bugs you

- With the crisis which bugs you

- What is sweeter than

an exquisite death

- An exquisite death

Be lucid and daring

Be lucid and daring

Let's say it

- Long life to suicide!

- Enter, enter

Do not be afraid

We are open until 20 pm

Everything is fast

Nothing is misleading

To help you die is our happiness.

- Although it costs you

The first step

Remember that

We are here

- To help you

Without fuss

To go from life to death

From life to death

With the crisis, which bugs you

With the crisis, which bugs you

- What is sweeter than

An exquisite death

An exquisite death

Be lucid


Be lucid

and daring

Let's say it

Long life to suicide!

- Welcome to paradise

End of worries

As I am saying

- Everything is allowed

Nothing forbidden

- Except that

we don't give credit

To depart

There's a thousand ways

- A fatal choice

Not to mention the hanging-

It's her passion

- Just to think about it

gives me a thrill

The great thrill

With the crisis-

which bugs you

With the crisis which bugs you

- What is sweeter

Than an exquisite death

An exquisite death

Be lucid and daring

Be lucid and daring

Let's say it

Long life to suicide!

We offer quality products.

We guarantee death.

Our motto is to reassure

Either deceased or reimbursed

- We are useful to the whole city

- They're useful

To the whole city

- Whatever your profile

Our profile

Forget it all.

Die in peace.

Die in peace.

Goodbye, life

So be it

Oh, it looks good...

- Hello.

- Enter.


- We will help you.

Right here

In this store you will find

what you need to kill yourself

It's for this gentleman.

I know. Mishima!

- What can I do

for your pleasure?

- Ben...

- We have the hemp rope.

Squeak, hanging.


We can provide the stool.


We also have it synthetic

The poison, a variety of vials.

Many different speeds.

This one, expensive, but crushes you

in 3 seconds. You are gone!


granules, 1 bullet revolvers.

The second is useless.

Sleeping pills,


Or razor blades.

Bath, open veins...

Unstoppably photogenic.

My son sharpens them

one by one.

Oh yeah.

- So?

What do you say?

In fact...

As blades we also have low prices

Rusty ones.

If you don't cut deep enough

tetanus is guaranteed

Ah yes, it is tempting.

In fact, I hesitate

between the gas and the poison.

- Yes...

- I'll take a poison.

Take this. It's on sale.

Lightning quick. Guaranteed result.

It sells really well.

It's trendy.

- I'll take that, then.

- Lucrce...

Do I gift wrap it?

- No. It's for me.

- It would be more joyful.

That's it.

Ah yes, still...

You can give death to yourself

but death itself is not free.

Anyway, where you are going

you won't spend a penny.

Cries of pain

Are you expecting

a happy event?

- Happy, not sure.

- It will be soon?

- Imminent.

And you, you have orphans?

Excuse me?

I mean you have children?

- No. Seeing what life has in store for them...

Goodbye, sir.

- Thank you very much Madam.

Well then, good evening.

- Thank you. Sorry.

What's good


When life is not rosy

When the mood

Is gloomy

What's the use fighting

Against pessimism

But what is being proposed

- Sadness, horror, etc

Nothing to say

When one sees that

It's not worse

than being rats

- To stop climbing those stairs

To stop seeing this scene

To leave before dawn

Because in a few moments

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Patrice Leconte

Patrice Leconte (French: [ləkɔ̃t]; born 12 November 1947) is a French film director, actor, comic strip writer, and screenwriter. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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