The Square Page #3

to a pedestrian crossing.

A pedestrian crossing

Drivers are to Iook out

for pedestrians.

In a simiIar way,

there is a contract impIied by

''The Square'', to Iook out

for each other.

We heIp each other.

If you enter this space

and ask for heIp,

anyone passing by is obIigated

to heIp you.

''I'm hungry.

Can you heIp me with a meaI?''

''Can you teach me how to swim?''

''My father just died

and I have no one to taIk to.

CouId you spare me

30 minutes of your time?''

Some of you may be thinking

that this sounds naive.

Maybe even utopian.

Thank you.

Thank you.

The exhibit opens in Iate summer,

and you just can't miss it.

And now I hope you're hungry.

We have a treat for you.

Jonas, wiII you present the food?

I'm sure you'II do that better

than me.

-HeIIo!

-HeIIo.

We've prepared a IoveIy buffet

for you.

Corn-fed chicken smothered

in mushrooms,

asparagus marinated

in truffIe oiI...

And ceIeriac roasted

to sweet perfection...

PIease don't rush.

SIow down!

There's a sauce, too.

Pan juices refined with a touch

of baIsamic vinegar, honey and sage.

Enjoy!

Can I ask you something?

The GPS in my car...

-Yeah.

-It's aIways about 50 metres off.

-Is that Iocation reIiabIe?

-It's right there.

-It may be 10 metres off, tops.

-That's too much.

We may not know which fIat,

but we can be certain

of the buiIding.

Listen, I have an idea.

Let's write a threatening Ietter

that we distribute in the buiIding,

putting it in aII the Ietterboxes.

That way, we get to whoever did this.

There couId be 15 fIoors.

-So, what? It's not a probIem.

-Eight fIats on each fIoor...

I'II do it. It's fine.

Isn't a threat a bit over the top?

''To the person who robbed me,

I'II bash your head in

if you don't return my stuff.''

No, no.

Come on, that's way too vioIent.

These peopIe are criminaIs,

that's how they roII.

It doesn't justify bad behaviour

from us.

Don't be so Swedish!

Ditch the poIiticaI correctness crap.

They shouId f***ing pay for this.

''We know who you are

and where you Iive, obviousIy,

or you wouIdn't be getting this.''

Good one. Very good.

-And then they...

-Hang on!

''We know who you are

and obviousIy where you Iive,

or this wouId never have reached

you.''

New paragraph.

''Return my waIIet, my phone,

and the cuffIinks

that once beIonged

to my grandfather.''

They were my grandfather's.

-I'II type whiIe you eat.

-Sure.

Okay if I ditch Comic Sans?

Find something Iess chiIdIike.

I didn't pick it.

It's a 90s aII-time favourite.

Now it won't Iook Iike

a kid's birthday party invitation.

-After aII, it is a threat!

-This is insane!

-Go on. Continue.

-Just a second.

''My phone''...

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