The Rise & Fall of a White Collar Hooligan Page #2
- R
- Year:
- 2012
- 81 min
- 38 Views
Just until we're both earning.
I know, football is part of you,
I love you,
ergo I must understand
and love your love of football
even if I don't share it.
Now, I'm not gonna start moaning
about buying you a season ticket.
Just don't let me down, OK?
I won't, I promise.
Safe.
Oh, what, the short slee...?
Don't worry, they'll grow back, mate.
What attracted me most
to working in a ladies clothes shop?
Ladies.
Huh. You all right there? Wanna...
Job like this
must take a lot of restraint.
Yeah, seriously,
you wanna be quiet a little bit?
This is lovely.
This is a bit of me, this, look.
Oh, it's a bit tight, though, innit?
F***ing hell, have I put on weight?
Do I look fat to you, bruv?
Have you got any experience
recording live music?
Not much live music per se,
but I do remember recording the radio,
and it takes a lot of skill to press
stop before the DJ starts talking.
Listen, listen, don't, don't...
I'll do anything, all right?
I'm... I'm a bit f***ing desperate,
to be honest.
I like gold, really, 'cause
you should always invest in gold
'cause it's... available.
But I've got a bird
and she obviously wears clothes.
You know. Pretty much makes me
a f***ing expert really, doesn't it?
You ever used an MX380 before?
No worries. I should be sweet with that.
I prefer the blackberry, though.
Now, seriously now, yeah?
I'll do cash in hand, all right? Just
under the table, no questions. Yeah?
- Can I have a job?
- No.
All right, can I have a doner and chips?
Hold the salad.
Leave us alone, would you?
What the f***'s all this?
Well, maybe it's time
to just lower your sights a little bit
You've been out of work for a while,
which doesn't look good on your CV.
And not to mention they've stopped
paying your Jobseeker's Allowance.
Mm.
There is one more place I could try.
[whistling]
Hey-
- Sorry I'm late.
- About f***ing time.
- Have you seen this?
- What's that?
and we're spending 18 million quid
on a centre back.
He's too f***ing short.
Here, listen, good things come
in small packages. Don't worry about it.
- Is that what the missus told you?
- Shut up.
Speaking of small packages,
that, my friend, is yours.
It's a f***ing hairdryer.
I'm gonna get f***ing laughed at.
No, you're not, mate.
Come on, look at it.
It's the embodiment of inconspicuous.
It's great on fuel economy.
It's fully insured
and it is all 100% yours, for work.
Come on, mate. Look at it.
I can totally see you in this car.
- Mikey, the successful hooligan.
- F*** off.
All right, well, how about this?
New phone.
Brand-new work phone.
New phone, new car, fully insured.
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