
The Muppet Christmas Carol
- G
- Year:
- 1992
- 85 min
- 183 Views
- Well. That was a fine meal.
- Yes. It was. Wasn't it?
- Let's have. Uh. Lunch!
- Oh. Good idea.
- Now quiet down. You melons.
- Hey. I'm being stolen!
Hey. Help me! Help me!
Hey. Put me down!
What about my nose?
Ow!
Banana peels comin' down!
Come along. Ladies.
Here's a nice Christmas turkey.
Turkeys!
Get your Christmas turkey.
Hey. Wha...
Get back in that box there!
Get your boomerang fish.
Oh! Guaranteed fresh.
Throw the fish away.
and it comes back to me.
- Get 'em while they're fresh.
- Apples! Christmas apples!
- We got Mclntosh!
- Get your Christmas apples.
- Red Delicious.
- Tuppence apiece while they last.
We... They won't last long
the way you're eating them.
Hey. I'm creatin' scarcity.
Drives the prices up.
Rizzo...
Hello! Welcome to
- I am here to tell the story.
- And I am here for the food.
- My name is Charles Dickens.
- And my name is Rizzo the Rat.
Hey. Wait a second.
You're not Charles Dickens.
- I am too!
- No.
who hangs out with a rat?
- Absolutely!
- Dickens was a 19th-century novelist.
- A genius!
- Oh. You're too kind.
Well. Because I know the story
of"A Christmas Carol"
like the back of my hand.
- Prove it!
- All right.
Um. There's a little mole on my thumb
and. Uh. A scar on my wrist...
- From when I fell off my bicycle.
- No. No. No. No.
Don't tell us your hand.
Tell us the story.
Oh. Oh. Thank you. Yes.
The Marleys were dead to begin with.
- Wha- Wha... Pardon me?
- That's how the story begins. Rizzo.
The Marleys were dead to begin with.
as dead as a doornail.
It's a good beginning.
It's creepy and kind of spooky.
- Oh. Thank you. Rizzo.
- You're welcome. Mr Dickens.
In life. The Marleys
had been business partners...
with a shrewd moneylender
named Ebenezer Scrooge.
You will meet him
as he comes around that corner.
- Where?
- There.
- When?
- Now.
There he is.
Mr Ebenezer Scrooge.
Say. Is it gettin' colder out here?
When a cold wind blows
it chills you
Chills you to the bone
But there's nothing in nature that freezes
your heart like years of being alone
It paints you with indifference
Like a lady paints with rouge
- And the worst of the worst
- The most hated and cursed
Is the one that we call Scrooge
- Unkind as any
- And the wrath of many
This is Ebenezer Scrooge
Oh, there goes Mr Humbug
There goes Mr Grimm
If they gave a prize
for bein'mean
Old Scrooge, he loves his money
'cause he thinks it gives him power
If he became a flavour
you can bet he would be sour
Even the vegetables
don't like him.
There goes Mr Skinflint
There goes Mr Greed
The undisputed master
of the underhanded deed
for his dark and draughty houses
Us poor folk live in misery
It's even worse for mouses
Please. Sir.
I want some cheese.
He must be so lonely
He must be so sad
He goes to extremes
to convince us he's bad
He's really a victim
of fear and of pride
a sweet man inside
- Nah.
- Uh-uh.
There goes Mr Outrage
There goes Mr Sneer
He has no time for friends or fun
Don't ask him for a favour
'cause his nastiness increases
No crust of bread for those in need
No cheeses for us meeces
Scrooge liked the cold.
He was hard and sharp as a flint...
secretive. Self-contained.
as solitary as an oyster.
There goes Mr Heartless
There goes Mr Cruel
He never gives
He only takes
He lets his hunger rule
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"The Muppet Christmas Carol" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2019. Web. 13 Dec. 2019. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_muppet_christmas_carol_20904>.