The Man with Two Brains Page #5

Yes, sir.

I never, in my wildest imagination,

ever thought it could be like that.

That was the most exciting sexual

encounter... Without actually having it.

- That I ever almost had.

Doctor. I'm Dr. Felix Conrad. I'll be

escorting you to the lecture hall.

- Did you step off the elevator?

- There was no operator.

They're afraid. You haven't heard

about Vienna's elevator killer?

People have been getting

on elevators on one floor...

...only to arrive

at another floor dead.

- Like Beckerman.

- Dr. Beckerman, brilliant brain surgeon.

One of your colleagues.

- It's a great loss.

- I'm thankful you're all right.

The academy is looking forward

to hearing you lecture.

I hope I don't ruffle any feathers.

My speech might be a little radical...

...for some of the old guard.

It would take quite a bit to shock

any of this crowd.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I can envision a day...

...when the brains of brilliant men

can be kept alive in the bodies...

...of dumb people.

- What are they saying?

- They are just saying:

- You mean, it's just a general murmur?

- Yeah. Murmur.

You may murmur all you like.

But to make transplantation possible,

I have recently invented...

...the Cranial Screwtop method

of entry into the brain...

...whereby a large section

can be unscrewed...

...without having to shave the head.

And as a safety feature,

I've made it childproof.

To open, you push down

while turning...

Voil, the human brain.

- Where is this man's brain?

- Stolen.

It's the fourth incident this month.

I wish to apologize to our colleague.

This demonstration is now concluded.

- Dr. Hfuhruhurr?

- It's close.

- Yes?

- I am Dr. Alfred Necessiter.

- Dr. Alfred Necessiter.

- Would you like a drink?

- A drink would be interesting.

- I enjoyed your lecture today.

Lecture? They gave me a head

with three lemons in it.

That's why I enjoyed it.

I didn't have to hear your brilliant...

...but old-fashioned theories

on the human brain.

What do you mean, old-fashioned?

I happen to be the most advanced

brain man working today.

- I don't think so.

- Read this article.

Look at the underlined part.

And look at this.

Read the caption under the photo.

And these:
Newsweek,

Time, Cosmo...

...National Enquirer, Dolly Parton

wants to have my baby.

Don't tell me I'm old-fashioned.

I didn't mean to upset you.

You're the most brilliant...

...brain man working today.

I'm anxious to share my work with you.

It seems you're the one person

in the entire universe...

...who might understand it.

And I agree with what you said here.

"My brilliant research in brain

transplantation is unsurpassed...

...and will probably make my name

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