The Ladykillers Page #3

---

WELL, I DIDN'T REALLY STUDY

ANYPLACE, LADY. I JUST PICKED IT UP.

YOU KNOW, I WAS SO SURPRISED WHEN

I HEARD WHAT YOU WERE PLAYING.

IT BROUGHT BACK SOMETHING THAT REALLY

I'D COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT.

MY 21st BIRTHDAY PARTY.

YOU SEE, MY FATHER

HAD ENGAGED A STRING QUINTET...

TO COME IN AND PLAY

IN THE EVENING.

AND WHILE THEY WERE

PLAYING BOCCHERINI,

SOMEONE CAME IN AND SAID

THE OLD QUEEN HAD PASSED AWAY.

THEN EVERYONE WENT HOME.

AND THAT WAS:

THE END OF MY PARTY.

ALL THAT TIME AGO

IN PANGBOURNE.

WELL, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I'LL RUN AND MAKE THE TEA.

THE KETTLE MUST BE

NEARLY ON THE BOIL.

WHO'S SHE TALKING ABOUT?

OLD QUEEN WHO?

LOOK, I DON'T CARE HOW WE DO THIS

JOB, BUT LET'S LEAVE HER OUT OF IT.

I SAY, HADN'T WE BETTER

DISCUSS IT LATER?

I DON'T WANT TO DISCUSS IT.

I WANT IT SETTLED HERE AND NOW.

ALL RIGHT, LOUIS.

I'LL PUT IT TO THE VOTE.

NO ONE IS INDISPENSABLE,

AND CERTAINLY NOT YOU, LOUIS.

ONLY THE PLAN IS ESSENTIAL,

THE PLAN, MY PLAN.

MAJOR, IF WE DON'T USE MRS. "W,"

IF WE CALL IN SOMEONE ELSE, WE'LL

EACH HAVE TO TAKE A SMALLER CUT.

YES.

GOOD, WE SEE EYE-TO-EYE.

I DON'T CARE WHAT IT MEANS, I WANT HER

OUT OF IT. TWO FOR HER, ONE AGAINST.

HARRY? I JUST DON'T THINK WE CAN

DEPEND ON A SCREWY OLD DAME LIKE THAT.

IT'S UP TO YOU, ONE ROUND.

UH.

YOU GOING TO LEAVE A DECISION LIKE THIS

TO A THICK-EARED MUSCLE MAN LIKE HIM?

HOW WOULD HE KNOW? WHAT DO YOU

MEAN? I GOT A VOTE TOO, AIN'T I?

IT'S A DEMOCRACY, AIN'T IT? AND

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH MUSCLE ANYWAY?

OKAY, I'M WITH YOU AND THE MAJOR.

MRS. LOPSIDED JUST GOT ELECTED.

OF ALL THE STUPID WAYS TO DECIDE. BRAVO.

A MAJORITY DECISION

TO DO THE INTELLIGENT THING.

LOUIS, YOU ACCEPT THAT DECISION, OR YOU

PACK UP YOUR FIDDLE AND PLAY ELSEWHERE.

ALL RIGHT.

BUT THERE'S JUST ONE THING.

I'VE NEVER WORKED WITH YOU BEFORE,

AND I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOU.

BUT MAJOR HAS, AND HE SAYS YOU'VE GO QUITE A REPUTATION AS A MASTER BRAIN.

HE'D BETTER BE RIGHT. IF YOU DO YOUR

JOB AS WELL AS MRS. "W" WILL DO HERS,

I SHALL BE WELL SATISFIED.

YOU JUST WORRY ABOUT YOUR PLAN.

'CAUSE HER PART SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING SOMEBODY

DREAMT UP IN THE BOOBY HATCH TO WHILE AWAY-

WELL, NOW.

SHALL I BE MOTHER?

TRAIN NOW ARRIVING

AT PLATFORM ONE...

IS THE ONE-FIVE FROM CAMBRIDGE.

EXCUSE ME, MAJOR COURTNEY,

I WONDER IF PERHAPS

YOU'D LIKE SOME TEA?

I WONDER IF PERHAPS YOU'D

LIKE SOME TEA, MAJOR COURTNEY?

NO, THANK YOU, MRS. WILBERFORCE.

PLEASE DON'T BOTHER.

I COULD MAKE SOME COFFEE

IF YOU'D PREFER.

NO, THANK YOU.

YOU'RE VERY KIND. THANK YOU.

- YES, MRS. WILBERFORCE?

- SO SORRY TO BOTHER YOU, MAJOR.

BUT BEFORE YOU START AGAIN, WOULD

ONE OF YOU HOLD GENERAL GORDON FOR ME?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes