The Happy Ending Page #5

In the movie.

Miss?

Thank you.

Mary...

Is it midnight, yet?

Is everybody happy?

Yes!

- Al!

- Oh, yeah.

You remember? From Cheyenne.

Well, if Jesus

was a Jew, does that make God a Jew, too?

Fantastic!

God, speaking existentially...

Sex after marriage,

what do you think, Mary?

It's something everyone has to go through.

Mary, it's a marvelous party.

Isn't Fred wonderful?

He is.

- Fred, get ready, ready, ready!

- What?

- Oh, ready, ready yeah.

- Lights.

Ready.

Cake. Cake. C-A-K-E!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot

Oh!

Oh, this is wonderful!

Congratulations!

Oh, I'm so proud.

I was saying that marriage

is a kind of fulfilling institution.

I mean, I've known this couple for so long

that it does one's heart so much good.

We'll take a cup of kindness yet

For auld lang syne

Happy anniversary!

To the happy couple.

Where?

Happy anniversary, darling.

Hey, have you

ever considered adultery as a way of life?

Are you still married?

Would it make any difference?

Happy anniversary!

Anyway, this doctor shoots you in the ass

with this gorilla drug, seven days a week

for three months.

Is it expensive?

If it keeps me lookin' 30

and Harry thinkin' dirty, who cares?

If you're a writer,

you've got to meet my wife.

- I'm not a writer.

- Perfect! Helen doesn't read.

You're made for each other.

She'll remind you of the war.

I've never been in the war.

Terrific!

Then you'll enlist.

Class, huh? Class.

Baby, that's one thing

you've got, and that's class!

You ought to know,

you've pinched every acre of it.

Don't go away,

Helen will eat you alive.

Eat you alive.

Just a song at twilight

Well, it's a pleasure, Helen.

- Mary, Fred's wife.

- Sorry.

Was he kidding about his wife?

He was kidding.

I just got into town

and your husband said...

"Drop in any old time."

Yes.

I suppose I ought to know you.

All of Fred's clients are either famous,

infamous, rich, or about to get rich.

Which one are you?

And suppose I'm not a client?

Oh, you wouldn't be here.

Only clients are invited.

Friends aren't deductible.

Fred says,

"It's just as easy to be friendly with a client,

"as with someone you like."

See?

Comes love's old sweet song

You think everything's

a swindle, even marriage.

Especially marriage.

Well, you've been divorced twice,

so you're not a fairjudge.

Neither are you.

You haven't been married even once.

Watch it, Reverend.

They say it's better to burn than to marry.

Well, I believe the saying is,

"It's better to marry than burn."

No married man would say that.

It was said by God.

A bachelor.

He had the goods on me.

No kids, no divorce.

She doesn't even see her own children.

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