The Guardian
- R
- Year:
- 1990
- 92 min
- 283 Views
1
Hi, Lia.
You want me to
read you a story?
Once upon a time on the
edge of a great forest,
there lived a woodcutter
and his wife.
They were poor and had
barely enough to live on,
but they loved each
other and they loved
their two children,
Hansel and Gretel.
It was a time of
famine in the forest,
and the woodcutter
and his wife could
hardly find food to
fill their own bellies.
Let alone their two children.
They didn't know what to do.
In the end
the woodcutter said,
"We'll have to take the
children into the woods,
"and leave them to
fend for themselves."
While his wife was still
sleeping the next morning,
he took the children out with
him when he went to chop wood.
He said, "Sit and sleep under
this tree while I get to work.
"I'll wake you when
it's time to go home."
But when they
awoke it was dark,
and there was no
sign of their father.
They were alone in the big,
dark forest, all alone.
Now Hansel and Gretel
were very scared.
They ran through the
woods, but everywhere
they'd see the wild
animals were waking.
Then they saw ahead of
them a wonderful house
that looked like a giant tree,
but inside there lived
a wicked witch who killed
children and ate them.
And when the children came
closer the tree began to move.
Scotty, you better
practice that Nintendo,
because when I get
home I'm gonna win.
- No way!
- Yeah!
I'll beat you,
no way, no no no!
Hello, little beauty,
you little beauty!
Bye, baby!
Bye, Diana.
We'll see you Sunday night.
Honey, you're gonna love this.
I forgot my glasses.
Alan!
Alan!
Alan!
The blood of the
child is pure now.
The cycle is complete.
Begin another.
George, call on
Line 27 please, George.
- You expecting snow?
- Oh!
- Phil Sterling, right?
- Yeah.
- Ralph Hess.
- Good to meet you.
Welcome to the
belly of the beast.
Call Mr. Zeller when
you can, Pamela, Mr. zeller.
I'll look at those lists
this afternoon, okay?
Vince,
Line 17, Vince.
Gail, say hello
to Phil Sterling.
Hello.
- How was the flight?
- Terrific.
- First time in LA?
- Yeah.
This is terrific.
Great face.
Nancy Roman,
you have a call on Line 18.
These are all good.
It's unusual to see a
public service campaign
with a sense of humor
and irreverence.
Thank you.
We're doin' a lot
of public service,
and there's no reason
why it shouldn't look
just as good as the rest
of our stuff, you know?
I understand.
Well, at the
agency in Chicago,
it was a hands-on
thing for you.
It's a little
different out here.
We have media planners,
marketing consultants,
creative directors.
Is that gonna be a problem?
I'm happy where I am.
I built a reputation in Chicago,
and we love living there.
Do you want the job?
Yes.
Charming.
I can fix that.
Can we afford this?
We can rent it
for six months.
'Til we find something.
It has potential.
Potential?
We're comin'
from a two bedroom
apartment on the
west side of Chicago.
It's a Ned Runcie
house, did you know that?
- Runcie?
- Yeah, the architect.
You know that room
up there by the kitchen?
Yeah.
It's gonna make
a beautiful den.
Really?
You don't just wanna
have a guest bedroom?
I don't want any guests.
Who do we know anyway?
What, do we think people are
gonna pop in from Chicago?
Oh, I don't know,
you never know,
somebody might
arrive unexpectedly.
One of your relatives?
Yeah, a relative,
you could say.
Only not to visit,
maybe permanently.
Your mother?
No, not my mother.
Smaller than my mother, smaller.
Oh, God, smaller
than your mother.
A rat.
A mouse,
an ant, a germ.
That's close.
Try sperm and you're warm.
Jesus.
Hello?
- Hi.
- Hi.
I'm just tryin' to
fix your door here.
I really meant to do this
before you moved in, but...
I'm Ned Runcie.
Honey, come meet the man
who designed this house!
Oh.
Yeah.
Hi, Ned Runcie.
How you doin'?
Hi, yeah.
You've built, what,
20 houses in the canyon?
Eh. 25.
Who's countin'?
- God, that's amazing.
- Can I get you some coffee?
No, no thanks.
God.
I'm gonna have some.
Look what they did to my floor.
Look at this!
Yeah, I was
wondering about that.
What'd they do, have bike
races in here or something?
God, you know, look,
I can have somebody
come in here
and polish this up,
and sand it up
for you, okay?
No, that's okay,
you don't have to--
No, really,
come on. I wanna--
I cannot tell you how
happy I am to meet you.
I'm an interior designer myself.
Oh yeah?
Do you know his
homes have been
in Architectural Digest, Phil?
Yeah.
This one.
This one was in
Architectural Digest.
- Really?
- Really?
Yes, before
they started having
bike races in the dining room.
Anyway, I just came
by to say hello.
I'm not gonna bother you.
I live right up the street
if you need anything.
I'm on Astral Drive,
it's kind of
a funny house with
a big chimney--
Oh, I think I
know that house.
Skylights, yeah.
Yeah, that, yeah.
What the hell?
I think we just had a five.
Hey, look at this.
Not a crack.
I'm never gonna be human
looking again, you know?
I love you.
Roseanne Barr.
Harder now, harder,
Kate, give it all you got!
Come on, come on,
here comes the head!
Okay! Just breathe,
just breathe!
Okay, push. Come on!
Push, push, push!
Okay, the head is out!
It's a boy!
It's a boy! He looks great!
He looks real good!
He's beautiful.
I'll let you see
him in just a minute.
Okay, he looks real good,
we just gotta suction
him out here, okay?
Hi there.
Honey, he's so pretty.
Think we can
just about make it.
With both of us working, huh?
Yeah, why?
You havin' second thoughts?
No, I want to
work, I just want
to do what's right for Jake.
Hey.
Your folks worked.
Mine did. It's normal.
It's good for him to grow
up knowin' he's gotta work.
Isn't that right, Jake?
I agree, guzzle toes.
And I want to keep my
decorator's license, you know?
But I'm just having such
a good time doing this,
I just don't wanna
miss out on anything.
Well, do this for two years.
Then we'll be solid enough,
you can do what you want.
Okay.
Well, I've looked up
some child care agencies.
I think we oughta try
this one, Guardian Angel.
It's in Santa Monica.
It's your turn.
It was my turn last time.
No, you slept
through my turn.
Let's both sleep
through my turn.
Go!
You know sleep deprivation
is a well-known
form of torture?
Hey, Jakey.
Hey, buddy.
Open up, come on.
Yeah.
I work Mrs. Honez,
Herman Oaks,
three years.
I work Mr. and Mrs. Hansen,
four years in Longa Bee.
- Longa Bee?
- Longa Bee.
- Oh, Long Beach!
- Ah, si, si!
I suppose you'll want to
breastfeed, don't you, Kate?
For the first six months.
- Yeah.
- Hmm.
Six months?
Dr. Klein said that four
months would be plenty.
Well, of course there are
differing opinions these days.
Well, actually,
I've been having
some difficulty, it's
too watery or something.
You like television,
Mrs. Horniman?
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"The Guardian" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 4 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_guardian_20379>.
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