The Golden Calf Page #4

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Go away!

What do you mean 'Go away'?

Why then did you brand your threshing machine

with the invitation , 'Hey, let's ride!'?

My friend and I desire to make a business journey.

Precisely to 'Hey, let's ride!'

- Citizen-gentleman, please!

- No. - You'll be sorry!

You cannot go far in this carriage of the past.

If you please. Where may I take you?

This time, nowhere. There is no money.

Can't do anything about it. Sheer poverty.

Never mind, get in!

I'll take you for nothing.

Why such sacrifices?

Promise only not to drink vodka,

not to dance naked by the moonlight.

What makes you think that

we are capable of dancing in the nude?

- Get in! Hey, let's ride!

- Let's accept this hospitality.

- Where?

- To Chernomorsk.

Where?!

Merely 1000 km southward.

There we have a small intimate business.

In Chernomorsk antiques are appreciated

and people are pleased to ride in them.

While in Arbatov you have nothing to lose

but your spare chains.

You'll not go hungry on the road;

this is my responsibility.

In a word - the gasoline is yours,

the ideas are ours.

Participants of the auto race have been greeted

by sounds of orchestra at Arbatov market square.

What auto race?

Won't they chase after us?

You should read newspapers, Shura.

Sometimes they reveal that

which is wise, good, eternal...

We are located in the line of auto race

Moscow-Kharkov-Moscow.

For a period of time we'll be

the front machine of the race. Get it?

That's Panikovsky running! Panikovsky!

- Stop! Stop!

- Ah, viper!

- Save me! - God will help you.

- Shall we take the viper?

Don't. He'll know better next time

than to violate a pact.

Take me! I'll be good!

I'll never do it again!

- Drop that bird! - I can't do it!

- Drop, I say!

- Adam! What do you call your wagon?

- Lauren-Dietrich.

That's a hell of a rotten name!

An automobile, like a battleship,

must have its own name.

Your Lauren-Dietrich is distinguished

by remarkable speed...

...and a noble beauty of line.

Therefore I propose that we give

to the machine the name Antelope-Gnu.

Any objections? Unanimous!

Full speed ahead, then!

The session continues.

Destination - Chernomorsk

- Greetings!

- How are you!

Comrade Koreiko, how much is 836 by 423?

Phenomenon!

Another man in his place

would make himself a career,

but he is just an idiot.

He'll sit here the rest of his life

on his forty-six rubles.

A church with a village to the starboard, sir!

Drop anchor, sir?

For 5 minutes. Behind us are first-class machines.

Meeting them does not enter into our plans.

- How about the gasoline?

- It should last till Udoev.

- Shall we respond to greetings?

- Reply with bows and smiles.

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