The Full Treatment Page #5

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How do you do,

Mrs Stonehouse?

What, me,

married to that?

Now don't bite the hand

that feeds you.

Connie's my secretary.

Oh, I'm sorry.

- Granted.

- Allow me.

Hey, didn't I read that you had

a mad pile-up or something?

Yeah, I did. But you've still had

more than me. Oh, thanks.

Well, what are you

doing here?

I'm in Cannes

for a couple of weeks.

Then off to Milan

for the Grand Prix.

But it won't be the same without

you and Giovanni. Do you remember...

Oh, Denise, I'm sorry.

It's all right.

It's two years ago now.

A forgotten lover?

No. A dead brother.

He was killed at Le Mans.

Yeah. Well, I'm staying

at the Mditerrane.

Let's beat it up

some night, eh, kids?

Alan?

How about it, Denise?

- Fine. It's a date.

- Good.

Now what?

A spider!

Oh! It's quite harmless,

unless you're a male spider.

This is a female.

You sure have good eyesight.

No. The male is always smaller.

And in case you're interested,

he gets eaten by the female after

he has performed his necessary functions.

Quelle horreur!

Ah! You know, women tend

to do the same thing.

I must say

I have never tried it.

I mean mentally

and psychologically.

You've obviously talked

to a lot of spiders.

No. But I've talked to men,

and, like spiders,

many of them enjoy being

eaten psychologically.

You can

take me off the list.

Oh, some fight against it.

It's a mechanism of this sort,

a bid to stave off

being eaten by women,

which operates

in certain individuals.

Is that why

you're a bachelor?

No. No. Unfortunately, most of

my experience is second-hand.

You mean from what

people tell you?

Partly.

What happens to the spider

that fights back?

Usually, it takes the form

of complete detachment,

callousness and lack of

affection towards women.

You can't accuse me

of that, can you, honey?

Don't be crude.

But more rarely it produces

such an intense hatred

that the man gets

unnaturally violent.

Such extremes are,

of course, abnormal.

And you read about them

in your Sunday paper.

Are you all right, Alan?

Yes. I'm all right.

- You don't look all right.

- Well, I am!

What is it, Colby?

Alan!

Give him a moment.

A man is always

embarrassed after anger.

What is it, dearie? Is he a madman?

What is it?

I don't quite know

what to say, monsieur.

My dear, Mrs Colby,

it's for me to apologise.

It's just that

my husband...

I'm sorry I caused

such an upheaval.

Even the Baroness has left

rather abruptly.

Looks like you'll have to watch

your table talk in future.

I think I'll just

collect my handbag.

- Hi.

- Hello.

Oh, no. You won't

desert me, too?

I'm sorry, but if you'll just show me

the way to the hotel road

because my heels,

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