The Football Factory Page #4

Can't you do better than that.?

What are you talking about, Bill?

Don't you know?

You f***ing disgusting old man!

That's what I loved about Bill.

He was still game.

He'd dreamed about. Living abroad for years

and how his time had come.

I even give him and Albert a little treat

for going away.

My grandson gave me a going-away present.

A joint of his very best home-grown.

You mean drugs?

Yeah, well, you light up old, son.

I'll make do with this.

It's amazing to think

in a couple of weeks

we'll be watching the sun go down

on the other side of the world.

And it won't be surrounded

by tower blocks.

Miles of golden sand and bronze tits.

You packed yet?

Haven't given it a thought.

My case has been packed

and sitting inside the front door for three days.

You want to get your skates on, Farrell.

Oh, stop nagging, you old woman.

- You know what Bert?

- What's that?

I'm feeling dizzy.

You always were, you dozy bastard!

The next best thing to violence is sex,

and seeing as there's

nearly 500,000 single women in London,

I must be in with half a chance.

Especially as I'd f***

anything that's breathing.

I tell you, I'm f***in' mullered, me.

I am f***in' mullered.

Look at the f***in' boat on it.

Imagine that round your f***in' helmet.

No, no, no, Tom.

Proper f***in' slosh pots.

Shut up, you...

What's the matter with you?

All right, sweetheart?

You all right, girl, yeah?

- All right?

- Do you want a drink?

A few tequilas?

A couple of little

cheeky tequilas, yeah?

Shall we get on it?

- A little cheeky tequila...?

- Tequilas.

Get these two birds here

a couple of tequilas.

I'm gonna smash the f***in'

granny out of that.

London's changed for the worse.

All the good people, right,

all the good people...

are being forced into the suburbs,

due to the influx of illegal immigrants

forcing their way into this country.

- I mean...

- Hey, mate.

Mate, will you shut your f***in' noise?

Here you are, sloppy bollocks.

You f***in' c*nt.

Get up there, girl. Get up there.

I cannot wait to f***in' see your fanny.

I'm gonna f***in' ruin you...

- Let's have a butcher's here. Rod, look.

- Smash you in the...

- Look at that.

Beautiful, beautiful.

He's only fallen asleep, Tameka.

Same here, Shian. Little f***ers.

Shame. He's hung like a pike in here.

Good for you.

I've got a stickleback in here.

You f***in' little mug!

How dare you come into my f***in' gaff,

and try and get hold of my little sister

against her will?

You're in bandit country now, boy,

no-one will even know

you were f***in' here.

There's holes dug all over South London

for people like you.

Jesus.

I was expecting cornflakes and a quick wank.

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