The First Turn-On Page #3

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Well, don't panic.

Well, let's look on

the positive side.

We still have light

and half a joint.

Half a joint.

And let's see, who

knows we're here.

My campers!

They're still back on

the trail waiting for me.

They are bound to come

and get us in no time.

Ahh!

Oh, boy, what a relief.

Hey, Clem, what's that

guy doing by our fence?

So hard to find a good

piss pole these days.

And this one is a beauty.

Hey, it looks like he's

breaking into our chicken coop.

What a relief.

Oh, my back teeth were floating.

My teeth were just

going to fall right out.

They were just floating.

Oh, thank goodness

I found this pole.

I thought it--

OK, buster, put up your hands

and turn around real slow.

Well, wait, wait, wait.

Shutup!

Put up your hands and

turn around real slow.

Well, OK.

Oh, don't hurt me.

Huh?

These water bills

are killing me.

Now, I told you I

wanted three campers

to pee before each flush.

Get it?

Got it.

Good.

Lebotomy, what

are you doing back

so soon from the nature hunt?

Danny Anderson.

Mitch, Annie, and

Henry-- funny cigarettes.

Frogs!

What are you trying to tell me?

Well, they're lost.

And they're not coming back.

Merriam, check on his story.

We've got to find those kids.

Some of them haven't

paid their bill yet.

What time is it, Miss Farmer?

Leave me alone.

Oh, excuse me.

What's the matter with you?

You've never been

touched by a man before?

Scared I might turn you on?

Big shot.

I am sick of yours

notty comments.

I have been touched by more men

than you could even imagine.

I bet you wouldn't even

know what to do if I

really let you touch me anyway.

Yeah, I bet you never even

have gotten laid, Stub.

Hey, listen, I wouldn't want

to bore you with the details.

Besides, you wouldn't

understand half of it anyway.

And don't call me Stub.

My name is Stud.

OK Stub, why don't you tell

us about your sexual conquests?

Yeah.

I don't want to

talk about this.

The act of sexual intercourse--

the coupling of two organisms

is the most important

and obviously essential

when in the life

cycle of the species.

What the hell did she just say?

She's trying to tell us she

never bobbed on a man before.

How about it, nature counselor?

I bet you're the world's

first 22-year-old virgin.

Yeah, when did Miss Nature

Teacher get her cherry

[popping sound] popped.

Aren't we all charming today?

OK, Stub, you're

going to enlighten us

on your vast sexual experience.

OK.

OK, all right.

I'll tell you all about

the first time I got laid.

Hmm?

Under one condition.

Yeah?

That you all tell me about

the first time you got laid.

What's the matter?

You've all done it haven't you?

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