The Farmer Takes a Wife Page #3

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IN HOT WEATHER,

AND WHEN IT COMES

TO SMELLING,

THERE AIN' HOGS AND HOGS.

THERE'S JUST HOGS.

YOU AIN'T GOT ANY IDEA

WHAT IT'S LIKE

RIDING WITH A PITLOAD OF

THEM IN THE END OF JUNE.

GOING DOWN THE HUDSON, THEY CUT US

OUT OF TOW AND PUT US AT THE END.

AND BY JEEPERS, THE WIND CHANGED

AND THEY PUT US UP FRONT AGAIN.

AND I WAS:

A LAUGHING STOCK.

WHY, FOLKS WOULDN'T EVEN

LET ME COME NEAR 'EM!

- YOU GOT A HOG BOAT.

- NO, I AIN'T GOT A HOG BOAT!

I SPENT ALL WINTER CLEANING

IT UP, AND IT SMELLS DECENT.

WHY, YOU DON'T SMELL

ANY HOG ABOUT ME.

NO, I DON'T.

NO, SIR, I'M AS CLEAN A SMELLING MAN

AS THERE IS:

ON THE CANAL NOW.

WHY, EVERYBODY'S

NOTICED IT.

I MIGHT GO:

SMELL YOUR BOAT.

HONEST, MR. FISHER,

IT'D DO YOU GOOD.

IT SMELLS JUST LIKE

NEW MOWN HAY.

I'LL COME OVER

LATER.

WELL, THANK YOU KINDLY,

MR. FISHER.

IS MR. SAMSON WEAVER

HERE?

HE WAS.

- RECKON HE'S BACK AT THE HOTEL NOW.

- THANK YOU.

GOT A LOAD FOR ME,

MR. FISHER?

DO THEY STILL HAVE

PASSENGER BOATS ON THE ERIE?

NOT SO MANY:

AS THEY USED TO.

THE PLAY ACTORS STILL

TRAVEL BY THEM, THOUGH.

SHOW COMING HERE

NEXT MONTH.

"JUNIUS BRUTUS BOOTH."

JEEPERS CREEPERS.

I READ ABOUT HIM.

HAD A GOOD SHOW HERE

LAST MONTH.

"HER FIRST FALSE STEP"

OR "TRAPPED FOR REVENGE."

- DID YOU SEE THAT?

- NO.

GOSH, I HOPE I CAN SEE

JUNIUS BRUTUS BOOTH, THOUGH.

WELL, IVY, THAT'S THE

BEST JOB I EVER DID.

FEELS LIKE I AIN'T GO NO TEETH AT ALL NOW.

YOU'LL BE

ALL RIGHT, IVY.

JUST DON'T EAT ANYTHING

FOR TWO OR THREE DAYS,

AND YOU MIGHT RUB A LITTLE

OF THAT GARGLING OIL ON IT.

MOLLY!

HELLO, FORTUNE!

HOW ARE YOU?

FINE NOW THA THE CANAL'S OPENING.

HEARD YOU WERE GAMBLING

ALL WINTER IN ALBANY.

WON AN OUTFI FROM A DENTIST.

LOOK,

MY FIRST PATIENT.

FORTUNE!

DID HE:

GET IT OUT?

I DON'T FEEL LIKE THIS SIDE

OF MY FACE IS HERE ANYMORE.

WELL, IT'S THERE.

YOU CAN SEE IT.

SHE'LL BE ALL RIGHT IN A FEW DAYS.

PROBABLY.

- $1?

- $2.

DOLLAR:

A TOOTH.

OH, BUT ONE TOOTH

WAS A MISTAKE!

IT WAS JUST AS HARD TO TAKE

OUT AS THE OTHER, ELMER.

OH,

I DON'T KNOW.

WE'LL LET MOLLY

DECIDE.

WELL...

IF YOU GET $1 FOR TAKING

OUT THE RIGHT TOOTH,

IT SEEMS TO ME YOU OUGHT TO GIVE A

DOLLAR FOR TAKING OUT THE WRONG ONE.

WELL, NOW, THERE'S A

FAIR ENOUGH TRANSACTION.

THAT MAKES YOU AND ME EVEN-STEVEN.

COME ON,

IVY.

NOW, WAIT A MINUTE,

ELMER.

NO, SIR. MOLLY'S WORD IS LAW.

NOW, LET'S TALK THIS OVER,

ELMER. NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.

DID YOU HAVE TO PUT ON YOUR

SUNDAY CLOTHES TO GO SHOPPING?

I DON'T AIM TO EA ON THE BOAT TONIGHT.

THE NIGHT BEFORE THE

OPENING OF THE SEASON?

SOME OF THE FELLAS WANT ME TO GO

OUT WITH THEM AND FANCY-DANDY AROUND.

THERE AIN'T NOBODY IN THIS TOWN WHO

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