The Crossing Guard

To lose

an 18-year-old brother.

He didn't get a chance to graduate

from high school. It was a blow.

It destroyed me.

It made me feel like-

I was afraid

to love anybody.

I was really afraid

to let people get close to me.

I felt

if I loved somebody,

deeply, you know,

like I do my family,

they would be taken away.

I said, "Where'd you learn

to do that?"

She said, "Practicing on

an old flame since I was 16."

Look at this guy here. He's lookin' at

me and beatin' his meat. I like that.

There she is. Right?

Miss America, 1912.

Ina!

Let's hear it for Ina.

Comes here every night,

huh, sweetie?

Right.

Let me have a kiss.

Bring out the broads!

Let me at him!

Let me at him!

Somebody throw a net

over this broad.

Did you see him kiss

that fat f***er?

Steve.

I'll always know him as 18.

He, uh-

He was killed by a drunk driver just

a month before he was to graduate.

And-

It's hard when you have

two policemen come in and say,

"Your daughter's dead. "

I op- I opened the door

and I saw 'em standing there,

and I said,

"Mandy's dead, isn't she?"

A mom knows.

All right!

Freddy, he's comin' over here.

You better slide in... a lot.

- He needs half a booth.

- Sunny. How ya doin', Sunny? Everything good?

How 'bout that?

How'd you like to spank it?

- Nice!

- Oh, yeah! But softly.

- Sunny, you had to spank that, right?

- Nice.

My wife,

you know Joan.

We got a step-down living room.

It's like two steps down.

So the b*tch don't wanna walk.

She wants me to raise it.

She don't wanna walk down

two steps.

I still have to get over that.

It's something that...

- you have to work with on a daily basis.

- it's not gonna come back.

It's just something of- It's yours.

It's like your body lost...

something inside,

something of yourself.

I miss me.

I miss... me.

It's over five years now,

and...

I look in the mirror,

"Where's Bobby?"

I don't know.

My family drives me

up the f***in' wall.

I mean, they, I guess they still,

they still think I'm me, Bobby.

But... they joke about it.

They call me...

sibling number three, all right?

And... it's like a nickname

for Bobby depressed.

It was my older brother Danny

that we lost.

And...

he was sibling number one.

And...

they, th-they didn't-

Did they forget?

I don't know.

I'm gone!

And-

I miss me.

So...

that's it.

Who's runnin'

this f***in' show?

- You oughta go.

- What?

Go.

- You should go.

- Okay, yeah. I'm gonna go.

Um... Freddy,

can I use your shower?

Help yourself.

# Woke up this mornin' #

# There was a chill in the air #

# Went into the kitchen

My cigarettes were lyin' there #

# Jacket hung on the chair

the way I left it last night #

# Everything was in place

Everything seemed all right #

# But you were missin' #

# Missing #

# Missing #

# Last night I dreamed

the sky went black #

# You were drifting down

Couldn't get back #

# Lost in trouble

so far from home #

# I reached for you

My arms were like stone #

# Woke and I'm missin' you #

# Missin' you #

# Missing #

# Oh #

# Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ##

Jefferey.

It's five after 10:00. I got a window

display of gray felt. What's goin' on?

Mr. Gale, you took all the vault keys

home last night.

- For f*** sakes.

- I think...

it would be wonderful to put emerald

pieces in front of the diamonds.

I trust your preference

in stones, Jefferey, but...

I'm very busy,

you know what I mean?

All the time,

I'm very busy.

So, uh, think ahead

a little bit.

I'm walkin' out the door,

you're closin' up,

you don't have the vault keys

in your pocket, stop me.

Yes, sir.

Emeralds in the front.

Wonderful.

What's so funny?

What are you

laughing at?

Ah, it's been

six f***ing years!

I mean, I have my son here.

Can't I be happy?

I've never heard

that word out of your mouth.

And in front of John.

Ma!

I've been in prison.

Don't make excuses for him. Listen, do

you still have that little TV I sent you?

- Yeah. It's in the box.

- Oh, good, because...

I'm cleaning out the trailer for you

if you want some privacy.

Oh, yeah.

That'd be great.

- Or you could stay in your own room.

- No, no, no. Trailer's great.

Because that's

a good f***ing TV.

Oh, my God!

Freddy.

How's it goin'?

Roger.

Good to see you.

Come in.

Uh, can I get you

something to drink?

- Phil, yeah. Let me call you back in five minutes.

- No, I'm fine.

All right. Thank you.

I'm sorry?

Uh, no, thank you.

Emily really loved

this thing.

We used to keep it

over there on the counter.

Stretch her whole body out

trying to reach it.

Last joint

on her little finger.

What?

N- Nothin'.

Come in.

Sit down, Freddy.

Boy. Tch.

You really look like a natural family.

You could be their father.

Thank you, Freddy.

Spectacular looking family,

really.

Um, what can I, uh,

do for you?

I really came to see Mary.

Oh. Well, I don't mean to be

nosy, Freddy, but what about?

Well, I'd really rather

talk to Mary about that.

Well-

Well, well, well.

- Um, you sure I can't get you something to drink?

- No, I'm fine.

- Anyway, I think they're here.

- Oh, yeah.

Hold on, guys.

Hold on.

- Hi, Dad!

- Hi, guys.

- Hi, Freddy.

- Hi, darling.

- We've got a visitor.

- Come on, Dad.

Well...

look at this.

My own kids

call me Freddy.

- You look wonderful.

- Wonderful, I think, would be pushing it.

No, you do.

You look wonderful.

Thank you.

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