The Cookout Page #2

Here we go.

Here we go.

Uh, please be seated.

Welcome to the National

Players Draft.

We're happy to welcome

our potential draft picks...

and their families.

Mama, get in here!

This is exciting!

Shoot!

You think cousin Todd

will introduce me...

to one of his

baller friends?

I need help with all

these daggone bills...

ever since Leon

violated his parole.

My kids ain't had

no father figure.

How you-all kids feel...

about calling

Vince Carter dad?

Let's begin with the first pick

of the 2004 draft.

New Jersey picks

Todd Andersen...

from Rutgers University.

Yes, baby!

Go ahead, cuz!

Number one, boy!

That's my boy! Oh, yeah!

Come on up here, Todd.

Aah!

All right.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Come on. Come on.

Sit down.

Number one!

I told you.

That boy's gonna be

the next Michael Jordan!

Congratulations.

Thank you.

Thank you, sir.

Got a few things

for you here.

Try this on for size.

Congratulations.

Aw, my man made it, man.

Man, cousin Todd

got drafted.

Drafted?

Damn this war!

Dog, he was gonna be

the next Dr. J, man.

Huh?

Cousin Todd. Why him?

You're stupid, man.

So anyway, a sister

comes in the room, right?

So I'm looking at the ass

like, ooh, I got two.

This is, like,

a manage or something...

about to jump off here.

You know Bling. I'm about

to get it popping. So-

Hey, yo, Bling!

Bling, isn't that

your boy Todd?

Didn't he take your spot

when you had whooping cough?

I didn't say

whooping cough, man.

I said I whooped his ass,

and he stole my glory.

Yo, his pockets is about to be

really swollen right now.

He's gonna be able

to buy a house.

He's gonna be able

to buy some new timbs.

He's gonna be able

to buy a Timex.

He's gonna be able to buy

an 8-track like mine.

He's gonna be able to buy

a thousand-pack Annihilators.

Yo, listen, listen.

I got an idea.

I heard that a pair

of Lebron James sneakers...

went for 3 g's on Ebay.

Alls we got to do...

is get a pair of

sneakers to Todd-

Forget that.

We're gonna take...

a bunch of sneakers

to Todd...

get him to sign them...

then we're gonna

put it on Ebay...

get phat money.

You understand what

I'm saying now?

Yeah. You think

he'll do it?

Do I think he'll do it?

He better do it...

unless he wants this

gat in his mouth.

You said...

You said gat or gut?

Come on, man.

I let my moms

hold it today, man.

Let's go.

That boy's gonna be

the next Michael Jordan.

That's right, Pop.

That's it!

If you had spent

a little more time...

working with your son

on his jump shot...

maybe he could have been

the next Michael Jordan.

Ma, come on. Relax, Ma.

I just want to be a doctor.

A doctor?

Boy, doctors

don't make no money...

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