The Brothers Page #4

- I got something to make it up to you.

- Oh, yeah, what you got?

As much as I'd like to,

unless you got some Viagra...

...Mr. Chubby needs a few minutes.

- He doesn't.

- Why not?

- I got skills.

Hey. Come on. Oh, okay.

Hey, girl, we gotta get

Janel some new books.

I got Dr. Seuss coming out of my ass.

I know, she does the same thing to me.

I suppose Terry's having a bachelor

party with lots of naked hos.

Yes, he is. You know,

I never thought Terry would fall.

He's got me feeling

like an old married man.

All this excitement over Terry

is a bunch of trouble for nothing.

First of all, he is not

the husband type.

He and that Brian have bed-hopped

ever since we've known them.

Terry ain't sh*t.

He's gonna give that up? Please!

A crackhead has a better chance

in a weightlifting contest.

You are funny. Boy, that was

a good one. Crackhead, weights.

You crack me up.

- It sounds like the coast is clear.

- Yeah.

You go on, express yourself.

Let me get that for you.

- Oh, no! No!

- No?! No!

- Baby, what is wrong now?

- I'm just not ready.

You're not ready?! You promised!

But, but I've been thinking,

and I just can't do it right now.

Sheila, come on, now. We've been

married for three long years.

- I know, but...

- But what?

- It's nasty.

- What the...?!

Hell, I'm all calmed down.

Come on, now. Come here.

Yes, I know.

You're all tense.

Lookit, relax. Relax.

Relax your jaws too. Relax.

Yes, yes. You see?

Speak into the mike. That's good.

See? See?

- Oh, no!

- No? Damn it!

You got me hard as Chinese arithmetic

in here and you bullshitting me.

Derrick, why did you come in here?

Why are you drinking now?

I am a grown man, and I cannot

get head from my wife!

Why don't you just go tell

our daughter?

Look, Sheila,

we have talked about this.

We went to the counsellor.

You said you were ready.

I know, but I was eating

a banana earlier today...

...and I gagged on it.

Don't gag on my banana,

and we can get going.

Derrick, honey, I can't.

- I do it to you.

- I don't ask you to.

You do not stop me either.

Okay, well, fine, you don't have

to do it anymore.

That's the difference between us.

I don't mind doing it.

I even like it.

So, if I had a dick,

would you suck it?

What kind of question is that?

You ain't no man.

Just answer the question.

If I had a dick, would you suck it?

Yes, I would, wearing a Viking hat

and a Little League chest protector!

- Derrick, baby!

- I paid my dues.

Baby, Derrick, Derrick.

All my life I was taught that

good girls just don't do that.

My mother told me that

if I did that, I would get cancer.

I am dealing with some serious

psychological barriers here.

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