
The Big One
- PG-13
- Year:
- 1997
- 91 min
- 74 Views
[People clapping, cheering]
MOORE:
Thank you very much.Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
I wanted to see if a politician
would accept money from anyone.
You know,
and I mean anyone, all right?
I don't mean,
like, R.J. Reynolds...
which gave a million dollars
to the Republicans...
and a half a million dollars...
to the non-smoking Democrats
this year.
I'm talking about
truly despicable groups.
So I formed four of
those despicable groups myself.
Got a bank to give me
a checking account for each...
with the name of the group
on the check...
and then sent $100 contributions
to each of the candidates.
So Bob Dole received $100...
from the Satan Worshipers
for Dole Club.
[Laughter and applause]
Clinton got $100 from
the Hemp Growers of America.
[Laughter]
Pat Buchanan got $100
from Abortionists for Buchanan.
[Laughter]
And...
Ross Perot got $100 from
the Pedophiles for Free Trade.
[Laughter]
And who do you think
cashed the check first?
[People shouting]
That's right, Pat Buchanan.
[Applause]
And here's
the actual check, with
his endorsement on the back.
[Applause]
Abortionists for Buchanan.
Mr. "Right to Life" himself.
The Clinton-Gore campaign
cashed their check...
from the Hemp Growers
of America. Right here.
it had been rolled up...
and stashed away
But you know how it is...
when you're receiving
contributions from hemp growers.
And Ross Perot sent us
a lovely form letter...
that obviously was spit
out of some computer...
because it said,
"I'd like to thank you...
"and your fellow pedophiles
for your support."
It's true.
[Laughter and applause]
Oh, we live in sick times.
Sick, sick times.
[Music playing]
[Bell clanging]
MOORE, NARRATING: You know,
I always like to see people...
happy and having a good time.
Take these people,
for instance.
They've been having
a real good time.
Me?
Well, I've been out of work.
So I did what
most people like me do...
when they can't get a job...
I wrote a book!
"Downsize This! Random Threats
from an Unarmed American."
I sold it to Random House.
They asked me
if I wouldn't mind...
going on a little author tour,
say four or five cities.
I said, "Sure. Sounds good."
Especially considering
I had no college education...
and flunked 12th grade English.
I kind of liked the idea of
being part of a go-go economy.
I could see it now...
Pulitzers, Nobels...
and appearances
[Audience yelling]
There was one little problem
with my master plan...
that check
I wrote the president.
Seems the White House
didn't like it.
I told them
I was just having some fun.
He is a dangerous person.
MOORE:
Boy, he sure seemed defensive.
Of course, at that time...
none of us knew
that lots of other people...
were writing checks
to the president...
and getting
better perks than me.
When it looked like...
I wasn't going to have
I called up a few filmmaking
friends of mine...
Tia, Jim, Brian, and Chris...
and told them
and meet me in St. Louis.
JIM:
not you, but...your tickets.
Why don't you do
a special on us?
- On how much you make?
- And how much work we do.
Did you ever
get your union back?
- Sort of.
- Sort of?
We'll tell you the next time,
if we do get a raise, ever.
Yeah. When was the last time
you had a raise?
- '83?
- I don't know.
MOORE:
'83?I don't know
if it was '78 or '82.
The cameraman
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"The Big One" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 26 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_big_one_4063>.