The Big Green Page #4

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Ma'am?

I don't think she likes me.

Why? -I explained why.

But if I don't play soccer,

I'll never make friends.

I am your friend.

-You're my mother!

There's no reason to make friends.

We'll only be here a short time.

You'd just be sadder when

we left. Come on, let's eat.

I'm not hungry.

Hey, Newt, what's

up? -Not much.

I found a part of a

tailpipe and an old shoe.

You seen anything good?

Nah. Look, I come here to ask you

to play soccer with the big kids.

See, they're fixing to start a

team, and we're down a player.

Wow! Nobody ever asks me to do

anything. Of course I'll play!

Good. Thing is, we got a game

right now. -Wow! A soccer game?

What's soccer anyway? -Well,

it's kinda like kickball

mixed with that there hockey.

Well, I don't know nothing about

kickball or hockey, but I'm your man.

Oh, Sheriff Tom! -Don't

touch my hat, boy.

This is ground control. Would

you do me a personal favor?

Zip it! And I'm getting upset now! I'll

cut a switch and I'll tan your hides!

What did I do? Why are you

hitting me? -He's hitting me!

And you boys just relax now.

Come on, boys. Settle down!

I swear, I'll deny

it. I'll deny it all.

Are we here to play

soccer? -No, sir!

Why are we here?

-To win soccer, sir!

I can't hear you, let's do it a little

louder. Are we here to play soccer?

No, sir!

Why are we here?

-To win soccer, sir!

All right, you're

killing grass. Let's move!

Let's go, let's

go. Here we go, now!

Pick it up, guys.

Come on! Come on!

We're playing these guys?

-At least we practiced.

All right, bring it over

here. Let's go! Right here.

Hey, is that the

team we're playing?

They don't even look like a team. Hey,

what do you turkeys call yourselves?

Hey, you guys,

what's our name?

We don't have a name.

We'll tell you later!

-They brought a goat!

Look, he just happened

to be in the car, OK?

We didn't bring

him on purpose.

Yeah, right. -I

wanna smell sweat.

Wait a minute. I know him.

K-N-l-G...

Hm. Looks rather tough.

-He was a real blockhead.

Tom, long time no see. -It's

been a few years there, Jay.

Well, va-va-voom! I'm Jay Huffer.

Tom and I grew up together.

That was back when we were

both young and innocent.

Must 've been when he was

a blockhead. -Excuse me?

She's from England, Jay.

There's a language situation.

This is Anna Montgomery. She's

an exchange teacher in Elma.

I got out as soon as I graduated.

Only losers stick around.

Hey, my kid's the leading

scorer. How's your kid doing?

Don't have a kid.

Really? And you're

coaching? Why bother?

Love of the game.

Hey, come on. I thought

we were gonna play now.

Just a second, Newt. Go on back

and we'll be with you in a minute.

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