The Beach Page #5

RICHARD (V.O.)

The police didn't want to waste any time

on it. They were just pissed off because

he was traveling on a false passport, name

of Mr. Daffy Duck, birthplace Ruritania,

which kind of f***ed up all the paperwork.

They pulled everyone in from the hotel,

but all they wanted form me was a

statement saying I found him and it looked

like he cut his wrists. No problem.

The detective studies Richard's passport.

DETECTIVE:

What are you doing in Thailand? Tourist?

RICHARD:

Traveler.

DETECTIVE:

You go to Patpong? See smoke from p*ssy,

ping pong ball from p*ssy, razor blade

from p*ssy; bird from p*ssy.

RICHARD:

I don't think so.

DETECTIVE:

Why not? Thai girls best in the world.

Thai food best in the world. Thai dope

best in the world.

RICHARD:

I wouldn't know anything about that, sir.

INT. POLICE STATION CORRIDOR. DAY

The door of the office opens and Richard walks out.

Lined up in the corridor, slouching against the walls, are

several other travelers from the hotel. At the front of the

queue are Francoise and Etienne.

The officer beckons Etienne into the office and closes the

door.

Richard and Francoise acknowledge each other with a smile.

INT. RICHARD'S HOTEL ROOM. DAY.

Richard is seated at the top of his bed, addressing his

speech out of shot while he holds the map.

RICHARD:

OK, this island may not actually exist.

And even if it does, we might not be able

to get there. But look at it like this:

what else is there to do around here?

Richard is alone.

RICHARD:

(continuing)

So what do you think? Are you going to

come or not. I'd be thrilled if you'd join

me, you and your…you and your boyfriend.

INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR. DAY

Richard knocks on his neighbors' door.

Etienne opens it.

RICHARD:

Hi. You want to take a hike? I mean a trip.

A journey. With your girlfriend and me. I

mean the two of you, and me. It's a secret

island. Paradise. You know the kind of

thing I'm talking about.

Francoise appears behind Etienne.

FRANCOISE:

Hi.

RICHARD:

Hi there. Here, take a look.

He shows Etienne the map.

RICHARD:

(continuing)

It's a map. The dead guy left it for me;

I think it's the place he tried to sell

you. It's going to be just f***ing great.

You want to come? I'd be thrilled if...

Francoise and Etienne are looking at him.

RICHARD (V.O.)

I realized that I had absolutely no idea

of how I was going to get there.

EXT. RAILWAY/THAI COUNTRYSIDE. NIGHT.

A train travels at night alongside fields.

INT. TRAIN. NIGHT

Richard is awake. Opposite him, Etienne and Francoise are

slumped together in sleep.

RICHARD (V.O.)

Etienne, however, and I have to hand it

to the guy, was f***ing great. He

organized the whole thing: tickets,

timetables, best route, the whole damn

trip.

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