The Accidental Husband Page #3

- The love doctor?

I got it off her

birth certificate.

- Oh, I don't know

about this, Ajay.

What are you talking about?

All you ever do is walk

around muttering...

about giving her a

piece of your mind...

or letting her have it

or fixing her wagon.

OK, for one, I've never said,

'Fix her wagon.'

If you've moved on,

that's different,

and I'm happy you

finally put this behind you.

Wait, whoa.

Maybe me tellin'

her how I feel...

and holdin' her

accountable would be,

you know, important

for my growth...

or whatever. What

do you think?

What am I, your

yogi? I thought...

you just wanted

a little payback.

- Let's do it.

- Nice.

Oh, no.

Now you're married.

I'm married.

- I'm what?

- Already married.

- According to who?

- 'According to whom.'

- The state of New York.

- That's impossible.

- I have never been married.

You must have the

wrong Emma Lloyd.

Emmaline Willing Lloyd?

Your real name is Emmaline?

A lot of things

you don't know about her.

- How do we fix this?

Annulment forms.

Fill them out.

Have them notarised.

Bring them back.

- I can't believe

I didn't know.

Your husband needs

to sign them.

- Fianc.

- Husband.

- I don't have a husband.

Then who is Patrick

Thomas Sullivan...

- of Astoria, New York?

- Who is he?

- I don't know.

- He's your husband.

His address is right there.

- Astoria?

- Queens.

I know a lawyer

who can sort this out quietly.

- I'm sure that

won't be necessary.

It will. I've got

a book to launch.

Yours, I might add.

- You don't think

I was married.

No. It's not that.

It's just the timing

of this could not be worse.

- I know.

I'm recalling 70,000 copies...

of a moving memoir...

by a new author that

we've trumpeted...

as the next Maya

Angelou who turns out...

to have plagiarised...

Guess who?

...Maya Angelou.

- I forgot about that one.

I didn't. The headline

'Love Doctor:
A polygamist'

- just flashed before my eyes.

- Hold these.

On top of everything,

Bollenbecker take-over.

They haven't announced

which publishers...

they'll keep and dump.

So one self-help author...

who can't seem to

help herself...

from being married,

Abdington Books

could be history.

I understand

completely. Trust me.

I'll take care of it.

Everything will be fine...

Oh, no, darling.

Naughty choc-y.

- You don't need this.

You're right.

Moment of weakness.

- Go get 'em.

- Taxi. Bye, sweetie.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello? Excuse me?

You're not Patrick

Sullivan, are you?

- You are? No.

- May I help you?

- I hope so. Is this

230133rd Street?

Yes. It is.

I'm looking for someone

who lives here...

by the unlikely name,

Patrick Sullivan.

Patrick.

Keep going, tall

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