Talon Falls

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- Hey!

- What the hell?

- Stop!

Please,

somebody's tryin' to kill me.

- What in heaven's name

are you talkin' about?

- They're all, they're all dead.

- Who's dead?

- Help me!

I don't wanna die.

- Where am I?

- I'm Dr. Onochectomy.

It appears you've

been in an accident.

A man found you on the side of the roadand you

were fortunate enough that he brought you in.

The police are on their way,

but why don't you tell

me what you remember.

- We were goin' on a trip

and there were four of us.

- And how did you

guys end up here?

- We...

We, uh...

- Okay, so where

are we going again?

- It's a surprise.

- It's hardly a surprise.

It's a dirty old cabin.

- Seriously.

- It f***in' sucks.

- It's not that bad.

- I just don't

understand why we have to

go so freakin' far out of town.

I mean, it is called camping.

Oh, that's enough time for

you to give your boyfriend

some good road head.

- And I bet you'd

wanna watch, too.

Perv.

- Come on, loser.

- Seriously, five minutes.

- Oh, I have to pee so bad.

Where's the bathroom?

- I don't know.

Hello?

Is anybody here?

Hello?

- What are you doing?

- Who in the hell are you?

- You just scared

the sh*t out of me.

- What are you doin' back here?

- Man, I was just

lookin' for the bathroom.

- Did you see the sign out

there said we're closed?

You're not supposed to go

through other people's things!

See, they're my tapes!

Bathroom's in the back.

Where y'all from?

- Nashville.

- Nashville?

- Yeah, we're down

here for fall break.

Goin' on a campin' trip.

- Campin' trip?

Where y'all headed?

- It's Kentucky, some

place in Goreville.

- You're in Kentucky, stupid.

- Huh.

- I've never heard of Goreville.

I live, I was born and

raised here in Lowes.

- I'd hate to live here.

Not much around here

to do, is there?

- Not unless you don't

mind killin' somethin'

every once in a while.

Haven't you ever

been huntin' before?

- Oh.

- Every once

in a while we get pricks

like you that don't mind

your own durn business.

I'm just kidding.

You lookin' for somethin' to do?

Check that out.

- All right, I'm ready.

- So, what is it supposed to be?

Some type of theme

park or somethin'?

- What is taking so long?

- Let's go check this out.

They got one of those haunted house

things you put up for Halloween.

- So?

- We gotta go check it out.

- There's now way Lindsay's gonna go for that.

- F*** her.

Quit bein' such a little p*ssy.

Come on, let's go.

- What is taking so long?

- Okay, so apparently there's

this haunted house, right?

Like, for Halloween?

- And?

- I thought we

could check it out.

- Talon falls.

Let me guess, Lance's idea?

- It could be fun.

- No.

- Seriously?

These things aren't

even that scary.

I bet it's cheesy.

- Okay.

Well, if it's cheesy and stupid,

then we don't have to go.

Great, I'm glad we

got that settled.

- So what's the plan, dude?

- It's only a couple of miles.

- They're here.

- All right.

- Have fun.

- Are you seriously just

gonna stay in the car?

- Yeah.

- See ya.

- I'll be fine.

- Okay.

- If you get bored I guess

you can come find us.

- I won't.

- I guess she's

stayin' in the car.

- Who cares?

- Oh, wish I had my jacket.

- Hey.

You okay?

- Yeah, I just got a little bit

creeped out bein' by myself.

- Well, you can hang out

here with us if you want.

- Yeah, that's fine.

But hey, I brought your jacket.

- Oh thanks.

So, bad news.

- What?

- It's gonna be at least

a couple more hours

that we have to stand in line.

- Are you seriously

gonna wait that long?

- Hell yeah.

- I don't know, dude.

- God, really?

- Hey guys, how y'all doin'?

- Great.

- She always this sarcastic?

- No, she's a f***in' b*tch.

- It's just cold and the

lines are really long.

- Well, y'all come out on

one of our busiest nights.

- Do you have any idea

how long it's gonna take?

- Probably about three hours.

Y'all guys aren't from

around here, are ya?

- No, we're actually

on a road trip.

We just thought we'd stop

and check this place out.

- Tell ya what, I'm not

supposed to do this,

but since it's your

first time here,

you got a little ways to go,

I've got four speed

passes you guys can have,

take y'all to the

front of the line.

- That's awesome.

- Okay, man.

Dude, what we gotta do?

- Well, just hold

out your right arms.

All right guys, just march

up to the front of the line,

show the gatekeeper your wrist,

and remember, don't tell

anybody I gave you those.

- Hey, thanks, dude.

We really appreciate this.

- No problem.

Y'all have fun.

- Let me outta here!

Let me outta here!

Let me out.

Come on, let me outta here.

Stop!

Let me out!

- Sh*t.

- Holy sh*t.

- No!

- Come on guys, let's just go.

- No, no, please don't.

No!

- Look at his f***in' ass.

Die, motherf***er!

- All right, man, let's go.

- Woo!

- Lance.

- I got dibs.

Come on, let's go.

- Sh*t, it's stuck.

- It's stuck.

- Nice.

- What about that one?

- Nope.

- Well.

At least they can see us.

- See, I told ya

somebody was watchin' us.

- Hello?

- Help me!

Please!

Help!

Please!

Please, help me.

Please!

Help!

Please help me.

Help!

What do you want from me?

Please help!

Get away from me!

Please! Please don't do this.

Help me.

- Thank god.

- Bye.

Lance, what?

- This is where

these f***ers stay at.

- Nice.

And creepy.

Can we go now?

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