Table For Three

Barkeep, what's

the drunkest I can get for, um,

two bucks?

For two bucks

I can let you drink

everything that spilled

on my overpour mat tonight...

Splatmat Special.

That sounds terrible.

Bring it.

- Third-wheeling it, huh?

- Huh?

Oh, yeah.

They're just friends from work.

You want some advice?

Watch your back

around those two.

- Watch my back?

- Couples are not to be trusted.

We just work together.

Yeah, it all seems innocent,

till one day

you're sitting in a bar,

telling a stranger about

how your life got ruined.

- You don't have to telI...

- It all started four months ago.

Karen Elizabeth Beale,

will you do me the great honor

of marrying me?

Look what you've done

to Alfonse!

Hey, you know,

it could have been worse.

How?

Technically she never said no.

Maybe it was too soon.

Too soon? We've been

dating for three months.

Almost.

I think anything under

a solid decade is impetuous,

if not downright irresponsible.

I'm sorry about this, man.

This is such bad timing.

I wish I could be here for

you right now, but...

No, I know. Look, it's fine.

I know how long you've

wanted this job, so...

Yeah well, if you ever

find yourself in central Germany,

you know,

schtop by!

Yeah, for sure.

Hey, do you mind?

We're having

a modern male moment here!

Take your time, Mr. Sensitive.

It's not my flight we're gonna miss.

Oh sh*t. Um, okay, I gotta bolt.

You sure you're gonna be okay?

Yeah, I'll be fine.

Oh, listen. Don't go falling for the

first girl that comes along, okay?

I know how you get.

All that hopeless romantic sh*t

will get you in nothing but trouble.

Trust me. Any shred of romance

that was left in me

was ground to

a bloody pulp yesterday.

Oh, good.

I mean, not good. I mean...

f***, you know what I mean.

Well, auf wiedersehen.

Eat some schnitzel for me

or something.

Aye. Be well.

And stay out of trouble.

Echo?

# La la la la #

# La la la la #

Knock it off, fuckhead!

# La la la la #

A**hole.

She won't let you out

for one beer?

Come on. What's that all about?

No, I'm not calling your wife a b*tch.

No no no...

Hello?

Come on, man.

How long have we been friends?

Okay. How long have

we been acquaintances?

Scott Teller. I bought

your futon a few years ago.

# Last night

I picked up the phone #

# Late call said

you were alone #

# Crying to me about #

# All of the things that we said #

# Apologized

for your ways #

# Said that you hadn't

slept in days #

# Said that you need me... #

Hey. I'm Nina.

Hi. Hi, Nina. I'm Scott.

I know this is

incredibly forward, but

I think you're really cute

and I was just wondering

if you'd maybe like to go out.

I'd love you.

I mean, I'd love to

go out sometime.

Not to say that I couldn't

love you at some point.

It's just, you know,

life is a very funny thing.

You never know what's

going to happen next.

Nina?

# So I came back,

opened my mind #

# Decided to

give you the time #

# To make it up to me #

# And not turn away... #

I gotta get a roommate.

You know, the best way

for me to introduce myself

would be to do a monologue.

Okay.

As she leads me to her bed,

I see for the first time

piles and piles of pink panties.

Heh.

Harold just has difficulty

communicating with others.

- Mmm.

- Don't you, Harold?

Mmm...

My vagina is unto the world's

vagina!

I live just around the corner,

so I can visit all the time.

Thank you.

Ryan Beckett.

Mary Kincaid. Hi.

Hi. Scott Teller.

Nice to meet you.

So, this place is awesome.

I was looking for a change last year,

so I moved downtown.

I'm a senior product reviewer

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