Table 58

Hey, guys! How about a hand?

All... your... fault.

New kid. Aw. Filled with hope.

Lights, camera... You!

Good morning, Milton Middle School!

Principal Friday here with

today's rundown-fundown!

Football game tomorrow,

which means pep rally today!

Go, interrupting cows!

Can I get a...

...moo-moo? Moo-moo!

Our mathletes will be heading

into their first academic

decathlon of the year.

Moo, four, six, eight!

Who do we moo-ppreciate?

Moo!

- Moo!

- And last thing, cowpokes.

We've been getting reports

of poison oak on the quad.

So, please, stay away or

you'll be covered in...

cow-lamine lotion.

As always, I will be signing off

with a little bonus humor.

What did one marine...

biologist waiter say to the other

marine biologist waiter?

Uh, I don't know, Principal Friday.

What did one marine biologist waiter say

to the other marine biologist waiter?

We all serve a... "porpoise. "

Because it sounds like "purpose. "

That's comedy gold.

Don't touch that.

Coach Peterson!

Oh, gah! Darn shoelaces.

What is it?

Who has four thumbs

and is your new starting quarterback?

Huh?

Oh. You're counting the

thumbs in the picture.

Ah, yes, I am. Logan Davis, new transfer.

I'd like to try out for the team.

I'd like a magic straw that

keeps me from gaining weight

each time they roll out

those minty green milkshakes.

I'm taking that as a "yes. "

- Uh-uh.

- Wha-uh?

The interrupting cows

are on a winning streak.

I haven't changed my lucky

underwear in five games.

You think I'm about to change my starters?

Oh... okay.

Well, think about it.

Thanks for your help, Dullbert.

I can't believe I dropped my favorite

pocket protector in the trash.

If we can't protect our pockets,

we're lost as a culture.

That bell you just heard...

cannot be un-rung.

Anyone caught loitering...

gets detention!

Wow. Looks great.

At my old school, you couldn't tell

where the plastic tray ended

or where the food began.

Did I ask you?

...is what I would say,

if I were in a bad mood.

Which I'm not.

Thank you, power yoga.

Namaste.

Maintenance! Light bulb's out!

Do your job and fix it.

Hey! Choir kids, loving that harmony.

Thank you.

"Collect ten for a free wedgie"?

- What is this?

- A punch card.

Nine more to go.

Whoa. Weird, am I right?

Anyway...

Uh, looking forward to sharing the gridiron

with you guys, this year.

Knuckles, pound it!

We've got our team. So the only person

you'll be playing football with, is Nana,

because she's slow and old

and smells like yeast.

But she's still a good Nana, so...

Stay away from Nana!

But I...

Get it together, maintenance!

Looking sharp, band kids!

Hey, I'm Logan Davis.

- Logan Davis?

- Yes?

It's called a "selfie,"

not a "self-and-some-rando-fie. "

Bebe Whitman. It's your pleasure, I'm sure.

Olive Dimitri.

Hobbies:
Rock collecting,

homework, and winning.

I put homework in the middle

so I can keep my eye on it.

Okay. What's your name?

Were my eyes open?

Cool! I slept with my eyes open!

Those who dare speak to

me call me "Dullbert. "

Boy. Hate to run into you

in a dark alley at night

or anywhere ever.

Past or future.

The crane is a symbol of

happiness, luck and peace.

Here, new friend.

Saw you trying to weasel

your way into Table One.

I wasn't weaseling. Pierce

Brown and Portia Lee.

They're all a bunch of snobs.

They call themselves "The Royals. "

Take their name out of

your filthy mouth, Jane!

The Royals are wonderful,

popular young adults.

They're always nominated for king and queen

on the royal court.

And let's thank our last

year's king and queen!

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