Sylvio

---

Five minutes Sylvio.

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

What's the ape, gonna break?

Hello?

Hello, my name is Sylvio.

I'm calling in regards

to your unpaid debt.

No, I don't talk to computers.

I am not a computer.

I am a gorilla.

- Merry Christmas Sylvio.

I have a kinship with the man

Does not need to understand

I like living here alone

I've disconnected all the phones

Unplugged the neon from the wall

Lead us not into withdraws

Don't introduce me to your kin

No nice to see ya, how ya been

- Don't look at him.

Come on, hurry up.

Hold a Obispo in my heart

Oh how I need a brand new start

All the sharks out in the sea

And the lightning bolts agree

They will

have a feast next week

thanks to the Salvation Army.

Volunteers are going to be

handing out Christmas baskets

today for those in need.

Carmelo Madoloni with that story.

The harsh winds

and freezing temperatures

didn't stop volunteers from

giving baskets to those in need.

More than two dozen volunteers

packed bags with all the fixings,

even to make the perfect Christmas dinner.

It's helped me a lot.

I understand what people go through.

So it gives us a whole new

perspective for everyone.

Caitlin Meque

is a high school senior.

It was all part of a fundraiser

that they put together

to give back to their community.

Andrew Bennet is a student

and current project leader.

He's happy to give back to his community

during the holidays.

Yeah everyone's

having a good time.

We're so involved with you know,

everyone looks like it's

good to see their faces

when we get--

It's taking care of a basic need,

but it goes beyond that.

If they don't have a traditional turkey

or ham at Christmas time,

this just makes it very special.

- Cindy!

Five debts collected.

Sylvio!

Sylvio, we need to talk.

I'm taking you off the phones.

I'm putting you on house visits.

Here's your first house.

Guy's name is Allen Reynolds.

Lay it on thick with this guy Sylvio.

I need results.

Report back to me ASAP.

Got that?

Good.

- I didn't know you were...

You're very tall.

Well come on in.

Al will meet you in a second.

Our second guest is arriving.

Taking him to the green room now.

Al took care of everything.

He has it all set up for you.

Just right in here.

Just make yourself at home.

Snacks, water, magazines?

- The deer don't necessarily

like to come out at night.

They're just as likely to

come out during the broad daylight.

Can you speak to that?

- That's exactly right.

They can pop out at any moment.

They're lurking behind bends in the road,

behind trees, anywhere.

Everyone listen real close.

I'm warning you.

Watch the road!

Boom!

- Great.

Okie dokey, well thanks

for joining us Tina.

Highly recommended book here.

Go out and get a copy at

at your local book store.

Give it to a friend, a family member.

Also a great gift.

You never know, it could save your life.

Thanks for joining us Tina.

I'm terrible under stress.

Would you like an

autographed copy of my book?

It's okay.

You can use ours.

- And we're back.

We're really happy to have our next guest.

His name is Terrance

and we're really gonna

put hit to the test today.

Now we can assure you

that Terrance has not seen

any of the items that

he's about to juggle.

Isn't that right Terrance?

Excellent, let's get

right to it, shall we?

I will now remove Terrance's blindfold.

Let's get this thing off.

Let's cheer him on at home.

Okay, and let's queue

some juggling music Jerry.

I give you Terrance, the mystery juggler.

- Whoa.

- Oh, I'm Terrance.

- Alright, sorry about that folks.

We had some technical difficulties,

but we're back on the air now.

It's time for, you call, we talk,

our community call in segment of the show.

That's where we talk

about community issues,

and what's going on in your community.

Let's get right into some calls.

Who is that gorilla.

He was hilarious!

What was all that stuff he was breaking?

Hey, you gotta have him back.

- No, he won't be coming

back, I just said that.

Okay, no more calls

about the gorilla please.

We're looking for community engagement.

What's going on in your community?

Okay we have Terra and Talsen.

You're live on the air.

Oh, nevermind.

I didn't realize

you weren't taking calls

about the gorilla anymore.

I was just gonna ask if he was

gonna be on the show again.

The gorilla.

- Okay, looks like we're all out of calls.

You wanna close it up Gerald?

Okay.

Thanks for tuning in.

Check back in tomorrow.

Same time, same place.

All week, every week.

The only five day a week,

afternoon show in Baltimore.

If you tuned in yesterday

you'll be familiar with our next guest.

Sylvio Bernardi, he's

a talented performer,

and today he's brought his own

original puppet show to the air.

Really neat stuff, really

looking forward to it.

So without further ado,

The Quiet Times with Herbert Herpels.

- Hey Al.

- Hey.

- Hey.

I know money's tight and I

don't wanna keep bugging you,

but none of us have gotten

our checks from last week.

- Mmhm.

Oh yeah.

I've been meaning to write you a check.

I'm sorry Maggie.

I just keep getting distracted.

Uh, yeah.

Let me just write you a check right now.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes