Sweet Home Alabama Page #4

God, always running for office.

I'm only thinking of you.|Say, um...

do you happen to have the Carmichaels'|number down there in Greenville?

I thought perhaps|I should introduce myself.

I would like to meet them first,|if you don't mind.

You do realize the press|is going to be all over this.

Happy couples don't sell.

So if there are any skeletons|in her closet, Andrew,...

we need to know about them.

You make clothes, right?

I design them.|There's a big difference.

Did you design anything|with stripes?

You called the sheriff?!

You know that old bastard|hates me!

For good reason!

Well, hell's bells, if|it ain't Felony Melanie.

Wade!

Hot damn, girl,|do we miss you around here!

Hey, I think I saw poor, old|Fuzz just the other day.

Oh, God,|you had to bring that up.

I can't believe|you're the sheriff!

Yep, I get to frisk pretty|little things like you all day...

and get paid for it.

Wade, can you try and be|a little more professional?

We got us a crime suspect here.

Now, Melanie, you can't just go|breaking into people's houses.

I didn't break in, Wade.|I used a key...

my key.

Well, it still ain't your house, darlin'.|I'm gonna have to escort you out.

Use the cuffs, Wade, please?

If you get him to sign these,|I'll let you run me out of town.

Now, that's none of your concern.

Well, what do we got here?

A bill of divorcement?

Hell, boy, I thought you said|you took care of this.

And I thought I had.

Obviously not.

Well, if you two are still|married, it's her house, too.

This here ain't nothin'|but a domestic dispute.

He didn't hit you, did he?

If he took a swing at you,|I'll take him in right now.

We take that stuff|pretty serious nowadays.

No, Wade,|Jake's never hit me.

You know what?

I don't have a single childhood memory|that doesn't have you two in it.

And that includes the night|I lit my ass on fire. Remember?

Wade...

Memory Lane is closed.

Ah, boy, you two got a whole lot|of catchin' up to do...

so I'm just gonna|leave you to it.

Man, I set you up with|your wife. You owe me one!

Why won't you just|sign the papers?!

There is nothin' I can do.

The law is the law,|and she has done nothin' wrong.

I suppose shoplifting steaks|at Winn-Dixie's okay.

I took 'em back,|and you know it!

You remember that vandalism out|at the stockyard? Totally her!

Like I could tip a cow|by myself.

Wade... isn't there|some outstanding warrant

for whoever dumped your mama's|tractor in the fishpond?

We only have 10 of these, and|it's gonna be gone for good.

So if you are loving|this monster...

We have eight only?

If I knew how to say that in|Italian, I would, but I don't.

If you love this...

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