Sweet Bird of Youth

Hey.

Hey, you, whoever you are.

- Are you awake now, princess?

- I want a drink.

- Oh, soon, princess.

- I want it now.

Oh, please...

...please get me a drink.

For God's sake, baby,

don't hold out on me.

It's coming up, princess.

Princess.

Those two flags just

ought about do it, boys.

Well, don't tell me that man with the

middle-age spread is Dan Hatcher.

Chance. Chance Wayne.

I never expected to see you again.

Not in these hereabouts.

Just because a man's

successful is no reason...

...to forget his old hometown.

- Anything I can do for you, Mr. Wayne?

Yeah, I want a suite.

Facing outside to the gulf.

Bedroom, living room, the best.

And also service that car out there.

The Cadillac convertible out front.

"Princess Kosmos."

"Princess Kos" what?

Kosmonopolis.

The Princess Kosmonopolis.

Hollywood, California?

She is traveling incognito.

Can I let you in on a little secret?

She is also Alexandra Del Lago,

the movie star.

She's not feeling very well. Car sickness.

I'll take her up by the veranda.

Honey...

...get me Dr. Scudder

at the Finley Hospital.

Hey.

Oh, it's Chance Wayne, all right, sir.

Big as life.

No, doc, he's not exactly alone.

Princess Kosmo

or something or another.

He said she's a moving-picture star.

Will you be right over? How soon?

Honey, try to get me Boss Finley

on the phone, will you, please?

Did you ever hear of

Princess Kosta-whatsit or...?

Hey.

- What are you doing?

- Don't you want these unpacked, sir?

The princess is finicky

about her things.

I'll take care of that later.

Yes, sir.

And about that bottle...

I didn't see any bottle, Mr. Wayne.

- How'd you know my name?

- I used to wait tables...

...at the club when you'd come

dancing with the same young lady.

That pretty young lady.

Boss Finley's daughter.

Yeah.

- What are you called?

- Fly.

Just like the fly, sir.

Fly.

And when you haul up the rest,

would you...

...bring up a bottle of vodka

and some ice?

Yes, sir.

And write yourself

a $5 tip on the check.

Yes, sir.

Now, shoo, Fly.

It's okay, princess. It's okay.

Good evening, doctor.

- Who's that?

- George Scudder.

Hello, doc.

How'd you know I was back?

Bad news travels fast.

It's very nice of you to make my

homecoming so warm and so friendly.

Your lady friend sounds like

she's coming out of ether.

The princess had a rough night.

Traveling.

- You hooked a princess? Gee!

- She's not using her real name...

Golly, I should think not,

checking into hotels with you.

George. You are the only

grown man I know...

...that still says "gee"

and "golly" and "gosh."

Well, I'm not as sophisticated as you.

Get me the Thomas J. Finley Hospital,

please.

- How's Heavenly?

- Don't tell me she's why you came back.

Hello, this is Dr. Scudder. Any calls?

Well, you tell her the

cesarean scar won't be visible...

...to anyone except her husband.

At least, I hope not.

All right. I'll take care of that.

I'll be there in 20 minutes. Right.

You sure got the

bedside manner, George.

Well, I don't get much practice

since I was made chief of staff.

Oh, man. You've got it made.

Why did you come back here?

Well, I still got a mother

and a girl here, that's why.

Mother's been waiting

for the surprise that I got.

But you asked "How's Heavenly,"

not "How's my mother."

I'll take that. The luggage

in the bedroom, please.

Yes, sir.

Does a...

...chief of staff take a snort, George?

Your...

Your mother died a few weeks ago.

This is the death certificate.

Why wasn't I notified?

Well, you were.

A few days before she died,

I sent you a telegram.

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