Simone Page #3

ELAINE:

God, Viktor. Why do you always

have to make things so difficult

for yourself?

VIKTOR:

Difficult. I'm difficult.

He produces a handful of candy from his pocket.

VIKTOR:

(referring to the candy)

-- Do you know what these are,

Elaine?

ELAINE:

(talking a piece of candy

and eating it)

Hmm... Mike and Ike's.

VIKTOR:

Not just any Mike & Ike's -- cherry

Mike & Ike's. Do you know why I,

Viktor Taransky, two-time Academy

Award nominated director --

ELAINE:

-- Viktor, that was Short Subject.

VIKTOR:

-- overseeing the most cherished

movie project of my career, am

walking around with a pocketful of

cherry Mike & Ike's?

Elaine takes a seat in a nearby studio cart as Viktor paces.

ELAINE:

-- I have a feeling you're going to

tell me.

VIKTOR:

-- I'll tell you why. It is

because Miss Nicola Anders,

supermodel with a SAG card God's

gift to cinema, has it written into

her contract that all cherry Mike &

Ike's be removed from her candy

dish along with strict instructions

that any room she walks into should

have seven packs of cigarettes

waiting for her three of them

opened, that there be a personal

jacuzzi within eighty paces of her

dressing room, and that any time

she travels, her nanny must fly

with her first class.

ELAINE:

-- What's wrong with that?

VIKTOR:

Elaine, she doesn't have any

children!

(grabbing her arm)

Don't you see? We're being held

hostage by 12 men and 5 women who

someone somewhere has decreed are

the A-list.

ELAINE:

The public decides who's on that

list.

VIKTOR:

Please.

ELAINE:

It's the truth. Those 17

superstars are our insurance

policy. We can't open -- can't

make a profit without them.

VIKTOR:

We can hardly make a profit with

them. Up-front salary, back-end

deal, perks, per diem, percentages

-- They're mocking us, Elaine.

We're at their mercy.

(staring wistful, into

space)

We always had movie stars but they

used to be our stars. We used to

decide who would play what role.

We told them what to wear, what to

say, who to date. When they were

under contract, we could change

their names if we wanted to -- more

than once!

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