EXT. GROUP HOME, COTTAGE -- MORNING

Standing in a circle is MASON, late-20s, a hug-able bear witha good heart and sense of humor. JESSICA, 20s with aclipboard, quiet, confident and looks like she could kicksome ass, and NATE, 20s, skinny and nervous as hell.

MASON:

Yeah, I mean, day one’s always alittle tough. It’s like, you know,

no matter how the training goes,

there’s always room for somethingthat’s just totally unpredictable.

(realizing)

Oh, I’ve got a pretty good storyfor you if you’re ready for it.

NATE:

Ok.

JESSICA:

Hey, what’s up?

NATE:

Hey.

MASON:

Did you guys meet?

NATE:

No. Nate.

JESSICA:

Hi.

NATE:

Hey.

JESSICA:

Jessica.

NATE:

...Jessica.

MASON:

Okay, listen up, so, this was like,

my first week on the job, and I'm

at gate duty.

NATE:

What's that?

Grace hops off her bike and walks it up to a small groupstanding outside of the building.

Grace jumps in. Mason sees her for the first time.

GRACE:

If a kid wants to leave, legally,

we can’t stop them. So we putsomeone at the gate to try to talkthem out of it.

MASON:

Whoa. You got here quick.

GRACE:

Yes I did. Good morning.

JESSICA:

Hi.

MASON:

Nate, this is Grace, she’s your newboss.

GRACE:

Oh.

NATE:

Hey.

GRACE:

Hi. Nice to meet you.

NATE:

Nice to meet you.

She shakes Nate's hand.

GRACE:

I would lose the tie if I were you.

And if you’re listening to a storyof Mason’s, understand that there’svery little reality in it.

MASON:

Hey, don't piss in the water beforewe put our toes in.

Jessica hands Grace a clipboard of the night's report.

JESSICA:

(to Grace)

Night shift was pretty mellow.

She goes through it as Mason entertains.

MASON:

Okay, so, Grace, my wonderful newboss at the time. She leaves me at

my gate duty for like 3 hourswithout a bathroom break, and I'mdying, because I ate the tacos thatthey serve here, and she failed totell me that they're a knownlaxative. So, this kid, 16 yearsold, this big fucking intimidatingdude, he’s like a foot taller thanme, he walks up, and he justcruises out the gate. It’s mysecond day, so I don’t know whatthe hell is going on, but Grace?

She’s standing right there and shejust let’s it happen.

GRACE:

(interrupting)

Whatever, what I saw was Mason justsitting there, and Wesley smilingat me from the opposite side of thegate, because he knows that wecan't touch him.

NATE:

Why not?

GRACE:

Once they’re a foot outside thegate we can't touch 'em.

MASON:

So Grace tells me to follow him, soI do. For hours, just walking, 8feet behind him. Eventually, hegets on this bus, so, I get on thebus too. And at this point, Ican't think of anything butwhatever the hell these tacos are

doing to my bowels, so I make up mymind, fuck this, I got to get offat the next stop or I'm going tolose it in my shorts right in frontof all these people. And exactlyas I make this decision, Wesleyleans his big-ass head over to mefrom across the aisle and he saysreally calm, "I'm getting off atthe next stop, and if you do too,

I'm going to rip your fucking ballsoff and feed 'em to you."

NATE:

Holy shit.

GRACE:

Remember what I said.

MASON:

(to Grace)

Hey now, this part is true, I was

there.

GRACE:

Really? Are you sure?

MASON:

Yeah.

(to Nate)

So, bus stops. He gets off. I

wait a second, I go over to the

door, but he’s just standing there

on the sidewalk like 10 feet away,

staring at me, waiting. What can I

do? I have no other choice. So, I

step off the bus, and the second

that my feet touch the ground, it

is like a knot in my asshole

unties, and the fiesta in my

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