Scary Movie 4

Oh!

Ow!

Help! Help!

Am I dead?

You're not dead.

You've been taken

against your will.

Kobe? Who is that?

Dr. Phil?

What the hell's going on?

I don't know. I was doing a show

on teens with abandonment issues...

and suddenly, I woke up here.

Man, those kids

are gonna be pissed.

Hello, gentlemen.

You don't know me,

but I know you.

You both play games

with other people for a living...

but, today, you play a game

for your lives.

Right now, you are both

breathing in a deadly nerve gas.

You have 120 seconds to reach

the antidote...

or you die.

Oh, my God!

We better get out of here!

Let the game begin.

There!

Hit the metal arm

with something.

There.

Damn it!

Sorry.

Shaquille, I'm not angry at you...

but we are one minute

away from death.

Just shut out the "No" voice.

Own your success.

Oh!

Just make the damn basket!

What the hell was that for?

You hurt my feelings.

Your feelings?

To hell with your feelings!

Everybody with their feelings!

"I'm obese."

"My kid's a brat." "Help me. Help me."

Just shut up!

Why can't I fix anyone?

I'm so dumb and worthless!

Mama was right! Mama was right!

Hey, hey! Pull yourself together.

You're a brilliant doctor.

Not exactly.

- What?

- I-I just tell people to "get real."

I'm not even a psychologist.

I'm... an electrician.

I failed you, Shaq.

I failed you.

- Booyah!

- Yes!

This will never work.

Of course- he wants us

to cut through our feet.

You go first.

Bullshit.

Yeah.

You're probably not man enough.

I guess your mama was right.

Never!

Who's the coward now, Mama?

Candy from a baby.

- Oh, my God!

- I did it. We're saved.

- What's wrong?

- Wrong foot.

Motherfu-

No one believed

in the early years

of the 21st century

that our world was being

watched...

the way a man with a microscope

might scrutinize the creatures

in a drop of water.

Yet across the gulf of space

a terrible evil prepared

to unleash itself

upon an unsuspecting human race.

You're up early.

Come back to bed.

Come on.

Please.

Hello? Hello?

Tom! Oh!

I know you missed me.

Oh, I missed you too. God, you look great.

I wanted to come by to thank you

for setting up that job interview for me.

This isn't a good time.

I just need something to keep me busy

now that Cody's out of the house.

He just turned 11.

I enrolled him in military

school last year.

It's supposed to be

a great program.

Boy, kids, you know,

they just grow up so fast.

So I heard

that you were dating again.

Knowing you,

I bet she's brainy.

"Quixotic."

Oh, you know, your work with

the elderly really inspired me, Tom.

I mean, they have

so much to teach us...

and we have so much

to teach them.

You know, ultimately, they...

really are just like us...

only... older.

Anyway, I'm hoping that

a new career will help

keep my mind off of...

bad memories.

I'm sure you have memories, too.

He's the kind of person you never forget.

Sometimes, I wake up in

the middle of the night

wondering where he is,

and then I remember.

I know you miss him, too,

but it's really been hardest on me.

I'm rattling on, but if you

don't vent your emotions...

they just well up inside of you

and burst out.

The harder you try,

the harder it all gets...

till you just can't

shake it off anymore.

Oh!

Like you're carrying around

this enormous burden.

Sometimes your problems

get so big.

- And then what do you say to yourself?

- Jesus!

Yes, you can turn to religion

or family and friends...

but in the end,

you're still in agony.

Maybe that's why

I want to become a nurse.

I'm just- I'm so in tune

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)