Return of the Killer Shrews Page #3

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Yes! Hector got me this gig.

Okay, you go looking for them.

If you find them, call me on that radio.

You pull this off, I'll make you P.A.

Hector!

Hector!

Booby!

Where could those guys be?

Just smile at the camera

and collect the cash.

Don't put anymore into it than that.

I have a source

at the network that tells me

this isn't going to last

more than half a season.

Yeah, you know why?

Because it's boring.

You know why it's boring?

Because they have me,

and they're not using me.

Me! I mean what they need to do

is they need to have a wild

animal attack

right at the vey beginning.

That way I can rip off my shirt.

I can wade into the water

and save the leading lady.

No, no.

You're just going to sit there.

You're just going to talk

to the camera,

and you're just going to follow

the script.

Boring! No, no, how about this...

An alligator attacks the camp.

That way I can rip off my shirt.

I can jump on that sucker's back

- and we can get right into it.

- No, look.

You know, you know

you don't have a stunt double.

- You know that, right?

- Well, we'll use a small alligator.

A small alligator.

I can handle a sma...

Whoah, check out the new talent.

But she's too young for you.

Yeah, but I'd make her one

heck of a mentor. Hi!

How are you? I'm the, uh,

I'm the guy.

She just gave me the stink eye.

I'm the star. Can she do that?

I think she just did.

Um, hi.

Do you guys mind if I sit here.

As a matter of fact, yes.

Please don't hate me

because I'm stunning, okay?

There is absolutely nothing

I can do about it.

Like a twelve, okay?

- Do you guys like my shirt?

- Oh, I sure do.

It really brings out my eyes.

I mean, your eyes.

Well, aren't you just

a smooth talker.

Okay, can we go back

to discussing the set-up now?

Thanks. Awesome.

What's a set-up?

- I'm full.

- Hector!

Uh, Mr. Reno,

they're ready for you on the set.

If you wanted me

to write something else,

you should have had me

write something up.

I'm just writing

what you're telling me to write

and now you're telling me

to change it.

Hello? Hello? Look, pay attention.

Great.

Great.

No coverage.

Great.

Where's my medicine?

Somebody say something?

That's a wrap.

I didn't know reality shows

had writers.

Somebody has to make this crap up.

Nice moves.

Say, have you seen Hector

and Bobby?

Hector and Bobby?

No. It's not like

I've been looking for them.

Thanks for the help.

Oh, the old watering hole.

Hey, do you think

this is going to leave a scar?

I mean the pain is really intense.

Well, ah, yeah, probably.

Ty a little tequila on there.

Works for me.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, tell,

tell me something.

- Tell me something.

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