Reality Bites Page #3

And I'll get in trouble,

and it just doesn't...

And you seem very sweet.

And you seem to like Dr. Zaius.

Oh. Ha ha.

-Oh, no.

-That's...

I'm sorry.

That's... He was just

a collector's... No big...

Well, we can...

-You know what?

-No, here's his head.

It's really... you know...

I think he's gone.

I'm, like, ruining

your whole life here.

No, no, you're not. Really.

Just don't... Just don't

touch anything else...

and I think we'll be fine.

Michael Grates, vice president

regional programming...

"In Your Face" TV.

We've seen it.

It's like MTV,

but with an edge.

-Yeah. So, is it a date?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Dinner?

-Coffee.

-Coffee or cappuccino?

-He ended up saying decaf.

Oh, no. Early night.

Is there any precoffee activity?

Um... I don't think so.

Did he ask you to go out

or to hang out?

Go out.

He definitely said go out.

Hey.

How are you doing?

-Oh, sh*t.

-What?

I forgot to tell you something.

Are you out of your mind?

Oh, my god. Lainie, he just got

fired from the newsstand.

He needs a place to stay

till he can find a new job...

and get his own place.

Vickie, that's the American

dream of the nineties.

That could take years.

Look at it like a built-in

security system.

We'll have a man

around the house.

We'll have a hall monitor.

That's what we'll have.

I don't even know if this is

allowed in the building.

It's not like Mr. Roper's

gonna burst in.

I'll just stay on the couch.

Vickie,

he will turn this place...

into a den of slack.

What the hell is your problem?

I have to work around here,

and unfortunately, Troy...

you are a master

at the art of time suckage.

Oh, well, I'm sorry, miss poster

girl for the workers party...

but until I get that toehold

in the burger industry...

I got a little time to suck.

I'd rather check into a shelter

than deal with her sh*t.

I know how much you

love to mainline in misery here.

But you don't have to.

I can get you a job interview

at my dad's plant.

What is that?

Part of my lease agreement?

It's either that

or a credit check.

It's cool, Troy.

You can stay.

Welcome to the maxi pad.

Yeah,

with the new dry-weave...

it actually pulls moisture

away from you. It's good.

You won't even know

I'm here.

Should I get married?

Should I be good?

Should I astound

the girl next door

with my velvet suit

and my Faustus hood?

And not take her to movies

but to cemeteries

and tell her of werewolf tongues

and forked clarinets?

What

"Hey, That's My Bike"...

would like to do eventually.

as a band...

is travel the countryside

like Woody Guthrie.

Or Richard Simmons.

You know how,

in his commercials...

how he travels around,

surprises people jogging.

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