Ratter Page #5

It was so sweet. I'm sorry. I'm Kent.

I'm Michael's roommate.

- Emma. Nice to meet you.

- Not cool.

Oh, come on, chill out.

Oh, do you guys go to school together?

- Yeah, we're in the same class.

- Oh, economicals. Cool. Very cool.

- Do you go to school?

- No, I'm a bartender.

I actually bartend a few blocks away.

You should come in.

Free shots on me. You can come too.

Oh, thank you. That's the first time

you're hooking me up. That's so nice.

Okay. Well, I'm gonna go to the bathroom.

Yeah. It's right back there.

By the way, I'm going out of town

for a few days...

so you have the place to yourself.

- Dude, what? Who is she?

- That's the chick I told you about, man.

Oh, my God. Tell me you got in there.

I'm not. You barging in like a douche bag

doesn't exactly help set the mood.

She's so f***ing hot. Please get in there.

Okay, she's gonna hear you.

Chill out. Would you please leave?

Okay. Okay. But you know

where the penis goes, right?

- The penis goes in your mouth.

- The vagina.

It goes in your mouth. Yeah, I do know.

- You need so much help.

- I appreciate that.

I'm probably gonna listen.

You guys have been hanging out a lot.

I know. I keep telling myself I can't fall

into something. I can't fall into something.

- Maybe just fall into his bed then.

- Oh, gosh.

No, I want to. It's just, I don't know,

I feel like I should wait.

Might be a little bit too soon

after my ex.

But Michael is awesome, right?

And he's so cute.

And he's really funny.

God, again. I keep getting

these weird text messages.

- From who?

- I don't know.

- They're all from a blocked number.

- What does it say?

It says, "you never told me

how you were doing."

I mean, I get weird texts too sometimes...

from people who are, like,

dialing the wrong number.

That's it, that's it, that's it!

Bye bye birdie, he got in four.

Sound on for the home team.

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You have four saved messages.

First saved message.

Hi, this is Patrick

from financial services.

Message skipped. Next message.

Hey, Em. It's Mom.

Give me a call when you can.

I'm planning Thanksgiving...

and I forget what days you have off.

Love you, bye.

Oh, my gosh. He's so cute.

I've wanted a cat for so long.

- You should get one.

- Been thinking about it.

I had two amazing cats growing up.

Winkle and Oreo.

Winkle?

- Love, 15.

- Your noises are really distracting.

I'm sorry. Oh, oh.

Stop.

Eh.

You sound like you're gonna throw up.

I am. Hah!

- Stop your noises.

- Strong rally.

Does the more forceful I do it

make it more forceful?

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