Pootie Tang Page #6

They don't let no air in.

Air is going, "Man, I'm air.

I'm on the list. Let me in."

And they won't let air in.

And you know air gets in everywhere.

That's how exclusive

a Biggie Shorty party is.

You know what else?

It's hard to get in too.

I hate you!

Go, Trucky! Go, Trucky!

Go, Trucky! Go, Trucky!

Go, Trucky! Go, Trucky!

Go, Trucky!

Pretty girl. Pretty girl.

Where you go, girl?

Pootie, you are the sexiest

bastard on God's green earth.

- Yeah.

- I tell you, though.

Someday I'm gonna get me

a piece of you myself.

- Sepatown.

- Sepatown, my ass.

You gonna be inside

of a bed with me someday.

You mark my words,

you skinny, wonderful man.

Pretty girl!

Pretty girl!

Sexy!

Pretty girl? Pretty girl!

How does a woman

get to you anyway?

It's like a state secret.

How to bed Pootie Tang.

Get off him already.

He don't want none of your mess.

I tell you what, Pootie.

Someday you gonna meet

your match in a woman.

Someday you gonna meet

the Darth Vader of T. and A.

Some woman's gonna kick

your ass and love you to death...

and then you gonna be

lying in the Dumpster...

done banged to death

by the dark side of love.

And on that day, Pootie...

I'm gonna be there.

And I'm gonna make

sweet love to you.

Sexy girl!

- Damn, man.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought she was

somebody else, man. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry.

Damn. I didn't get

your name, did l?

Damn. Do I know you?

Do you want me

to pull your legs off?

- Pardon me?

- You wanna make out?

I might enjoy that.

I just might enjoy that.

I might enjoy that. You know,

I just might enjoy that.

Shut up!

Okay, wait a minute.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Wait, wait, wait.

Wait a minute!

Look here. Call me a sissy,

but you need to stop, baby.

You are tearing me apart.

You're killing me.

- You want me to stop?

- Well, yes, I do.

Okay, then,

you tell me something.

- What do you wanna know?

- What's Pootie's secret?

I can't tell you that.

Now, I would never do

anything to hurt Pootie Tang.

But like I said, Ireenie knew

how to break a brother down.

- I can't tell you that.

- You can't? All right.

Okay, wait. I'll tell you.

I'll tell you.

I'll tell you. I'll tell you.

It's the belt.

It's the belt.

It's magical.

He can kick anybody's ass

with that damn belt.

Yeah. Give me your money,

you fancy pants bastard...

or I'll stick this

in you deep.

Wa-da-tah,

my damie.

Hey, I'm not your damie. Now, give

me your cash. I know you got it.

Hey, I told you to back off!

Pootie, the craziest thing

just happened to me.

I'm in the club, man.

I'm-- Pootie, look out.

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Pootie?

Everything under control?

Kayed a brother, di.

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