We hear the sound of a pitch pipe.
One, two, three, four --
As the Universal logo appears on screen, we hear Universal’s
theme song sung a cappella.
1 INT. LINCOLN CENTER - STAGE - CONTINUOUS 1
On stage, the Barden Treblemakers, an all-male a cappella
group dressed in matching smoking jackets, conclude singing
Universal’s theme song.
The audience cheers. Then, the Trebles begin Rihanna’s,
“Don’t Stop The Music,” and the place goes apeshit.
BARDEN TREBLEMAKERS (CONT’D)
PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIC, MUSIC,
MUSIC/PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIC,
MUSIC... (song continues)
2 INT. DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT 2
CREDITS ROLL as a gorgeous girl, CHLOE (20), dressed like a
1970’s flight attendant, frantically rummages through a
swanky dressing room.
Shitballs, where is it?
Chloe stops, reaches into her jacket pocket, and pulls out a
red scarf. Relieved, she DASHES out of the room.
3 INT. STAGE - SAME TIME 3
As the BU Treblemakers sing, we WIDEN TO REVEAL: A sold out
audience at Lincoln Center. The atmosphere is reminiscent of
an American Idol finale. PROUD PARENTS, COEDS, and A
CAPPELLA FANATICS hold up signs: “I HEART BELLAS”, “I’LL
TREBLE 4 YA!”, and “A CAPPELLA IS MY CO-PILOT!”
4 INT. BACKSTAGE STAIRWELL - SAME TIME 4
A winded Chloe runs up a set of stairs, clumsily wrapping the
scarf around her neck.
5 INT. ANNOUNCER BOOTH - SAME TIME 5
GAIL and JOHN, a cappella alums, color-commentate.
This is exactly the type of
performance you would expect to see
at “The International Championship
of Collegiate A Cappella.” Isn’t
that right, Gail?
John, you’re so right that
everything else seems wrong. This
is what the ICCA’s are all about.
The Barden Treblemakers. The guys are crushing
The Barden University Treblemakers
never disappoint. It is their
showbotage that is re-defining
modern a cappella. And the ladies,
well, they just can’t get enough.
Yes. Nothing makes a girl feel
more like a woman than a man who
sings like a boy.
A TREBLE steps forward to solo the next lyric.
I WANNA TAKE YOU AWAY.
On the word, “Away”, he goes flat.
That was flatter than my ex-wife’s
chest. The Asian one. [get alts]
6 INT. BACKSTAGE OF LINCOLN CENTER - SAME TIME 6
Chloe runs past a variety of A CAPPELLA GROUPS readying
themselves to compete, stopping at the all-female Bellas: A
group of model-esque ladies dressed exactly like her. Chloe
lifts up her scarf and comes face to face with Alice.
I found it!
On stage the BU Treblemakers continue singing.
Chloe, look at you. You’re a mess.
ALICE, the aggressive leader, undoes Chloe's scarf and then
methodically re-ties it.
You’re unreliable. You’re
unfocused. And your breath smells
like egg. Like, all the time.
Alice pushes the knot up to Chloe's throat. Chloe winces.
Then, Alice turns to address both Chloe and AUBREY, an
exceptionally focused girl standing next to her.
I can’t believe the Bellas are in
the hands of you two slut bags
after we graduate.
Alice gets right up in Aubrey’s face.
Eff up your solo, and I’ll tell
everyone you were born without a