Perfect Life Page #5

in the dark,

while walking

from somewhere to nowhere

at the slowest of speeds.

If you're a shaman,

what am I?

You are my muse.

A muse.

That's right,

we're "a-musing" together.

Are we ready?

Freddy's not here yet.

Ain't one girlfriend

enough for you?

Got meth?

No, this is

my own special sh*t.

This is

motor neuron stimulants.

This is motor crazy sh*t.

For the car?

No. DSD.

It is kind of like

what they give fighter pilots,

to make their nerves

and their reflexes sharp.

To sharpen up their reflexes.

It is kind of like speed,

you know,

but they take all the crazy

energy from the neurons,

and they make them--

Make them stronger,

instead of weaker.

Make them stronger,

'cause they're weaker.

What is it?

What?

This makes me smarter?

No, faster.

Let me try it.

Wait, let me--

No, just see what happens.

I haven't tasted

this sh*t yet.

Excuse me.

Remember, ladies,

only pussies can't drive 55.

Any less and you're out.

Go bag it.

The inmates have taken over

the asylum.

Thirty-five.

Forty.

Fifty!

Fifty-five!

Fifty-seven miles.

We'll be watching you.

(Engine starting)

Honda Prelude, '88 model.

It does have the airbag,

right?

Let's find out.

MILLER:

Are you clear on the rules?

Man, if I see brake lights,

you lose.

You've got to hit 55.

You won't lose

if you can't lose.

(Phone ringing)

Make this extremely quick.

FREDDY:

This ain't no thing

for a speed racer like you.

I thought you were gonna

leave me hanging.

Just another mission

for our heroes.

You're next.

Oh, click it or ticket.

Thank you, officer.

(Cheering)

MAN:

Jack?

Jack, you made it.

Who the f*** are you?

You're a lucky man, Jack.

I don't feel lucky.

Well, I'm here on behalf of

the fraternity.

I would just like to

ask you a question or two.

I almost

f***ing killed myself.

What more is there

to question?

Well, why do you want to be

a Veritas man?

Veritas gives hope.

Hope?

Yeah,

like if you die,

you got somebody

to give you a decent burial.

Well, you can always

pay people to do that.

Yeah, but you can not pay them

to give a f***.

So for you,

fraternity is like a family.

Yeah, I guess so.

And it's the only one

you've got.

Why don't you tell me why

I want to join Veritas, then.

Well, don't you remember

your Latin?

Veritas means truth.

(Phone ringing)

Hello?

FREDDY:

Jack?

Yeah?

Where are you right now?

Um, in bed.

Who is this?

It's the Prince of Darkness.

Freddy.

Hey!

Are you alone?

Yeah.

You're a f***ing liar!

You're f***ing my girlfriend!

You're f***ing dead!

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Nightmare.

What happened?

Freddy was here.

He saw us.

F***.

Did I hit my head?

(Chuckling)

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