Pardon My Sarong

Synopsis: A pair of bus drivers accidentally steal their own bus. With the company issuing a warrant for their arrest, they tag along with a playboy on a boat trip that finds them on a tropical island, where a jewel thief has sinister plans for them.
Director(s): Erle C. Kenton
Production: Universal
  1 nomination.
84 min

That bus only goes

ten blocks this way,

ten blocks this way

and ten blocks this way.

Why, it doesn't even

have to make a left-hand turn.

Gone! Completely

disappeared! No trace of it!

How in heaven's name does

anybody steal a crosstown bus?

What are the

drivers' names?

Algernon Shaw Harring

and Wellington Phlug.

Ah, this is no time

to make jokes!

They're new employees.

Shall I call the police?

And have us made the laughingstock of

the country? Get a private detective.

Yes, sir.

Crosstown bus disappears

right under our noses!

Wait 'til I get my hands

on bus number 5111.

Of all the bus drivers in

Chicago, I had to pick those two.

I should never have let you talk us

into leaving our crosstown bus route.

What are you worrying about?

We'll get a promotion. Yeah.

We'll have our pictures

in the papers.

I know what it's gonna say.

"Wanted by the police. "

Nothing of the kind.

Get a load of that.

"Tommy Layton

enters yacht race. "

You mean he's gonna enter this bus in

the boat race? Ye... No, certainly not!

After all...

Oh, will you keep your eyes

open? I can't. I'm sleepy.

I didn't get no sleep in that motel. Why?

Some dummy put the bed

in the closet.

It's a Murphy bed. Murphy

should have slept in it.

What are you...

Hold on to that.

Okay, I'll take it.

Drive straight.

We're running out of gas.

Running out of gas? Oh. Yes.

What are you driving

so fast for?

I got to get to a station

before we run out of gas. No, no.

How you gonna pay for gas? What

are you gonna use for dough?

Don't worry about the dough. I'll see

if I can get away with a baseball story.

- Hey, you like baseball?

- Do I? I never miss a game.

The last half of the 9th,

the score is tied.

Three men on base. Up comes

DiMagg. Three balls, two strikes.

The pitcher winds up,

throws... Zowie, a home run!

The Yanks win five to one. We

sure put it over, didn't we?

Yep, we sure put it over! We certainly did!


Hey, come back here!

How do you like that!

What happened?

I just got gypped by a

couple wise guys. Yeah?

Where's the

nearest gas station?

Never mind him. Fill it up. Fill it up.

Come on, girls, relax.

There we are.

How'd you enjoy the

trip? The next one's mine.

What are you doing?

- How'd you enjoy the trip?

- Fine, Tommy.

Come along, girls.

Hey, pardon me, but aren't

you Tommy Layton? Yeah.

And we're his nurses. Lucky patient.

I'm from the Oakmont Herald.

How's for a picture?



Thanks, girls.

Come on. Let's get back.

I've had enough air.

That'll be $12.50 for the

gas. $12.50 for the gas.

Tell him to put it on the

cuff. Put it on the cuff.

What do you mean,

"Put it on the cuff"?


Come on. We'll get it off

Mr. Layton. No fighting.

Mr. Layton, the man wants

$12.50 for the gas.

I'll settle everything

at the end of the trip.

Right now, money is

secondary. Just a minute.

How 'bout giving me a

little secondary? All right.

Here's $20.00. Keep the

change. $20.00. Keep the change.


You're welcome.

What's the matter with you?

What's wrong?

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Pay the man. How? The girl took the money.

What girl? The one with the

long red stuff and head too.

Oh, how are we going

to pay for this gas?

Wait, I've got it!

Go tell him the baseball story.

The baseball story? The old one? You know.

They don't know it out

here. They don't know it?

Certainly not. The one about the guy on...

Yes, yes, yes,

you know it. Go ahead.

That was $12.50, wasn't it? That's right.


ha-ha, $12.50.

You like baseball? Yeah, I'm

just crazy about baseball.

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

True Boardman

True Boardman (April 21, 1882 – September 28, 1918) was an American film actor of the silent era. He appeared in 137 films between 1911 and 1919 before falling victim to the 1918 flu pandemic. more…

All True Boardman scripts | True Boardman Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:



    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)


    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


    "Pardon My Sarong" STANDS4 LLC, 2022. Web. 7 Jul 2022. <>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    The Marketplace:

    Sell your Script !

    Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!


    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.