Outside In Page #5

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I'm a teenager, Mom.

It's what teenage girls do.

Okay.

- Hi.

- Hi.

Come on in.

Okay.

Well, this is it.

Wow.

It's, uh, not much,

but, works for us, so...

It's very nice.

Hildy's getting dressed.

She'll be out in just a minute.

Hildy! Chris is here.

Oh, Tom is at a car show

in Everett,

so he sends his regards.

- Oh, okay.

- Okay.

That's a bummer.

Um... So, uh,

is that what I think it is?

Oh, yes. Those boxes.

That's your case right there.

- Wow.

- Yeah.

- Pretty glamorous, huh?

- It's a lot, like 80 pounds...

Yeah.

- ...stuff right there.

- Hey, hi.

Hildy, Chris.

Oh, hey.

Last time I saw you,

my head was in the toilet.

Right.

What's that?

At the party, you know.

Anyway, it's stupid.

What kind of toilets

do you guys got?

Is it good?

Is it in good working order?

I don't... really... know.

'Cause I'm picky about

what I throw up in.

'Cause I'm definitely gonna throw up, no offense.

I mean, I have a lot

of volume when I puke.

You saw, right? You saw.

It's gonna be,

like, explosive.

Okay.

Well, Carol's cooking, so you might

find out how good the toilet is.

- What?

- Hildy!

That was good. It's a little

mean, but it was good.

Yeah, it was a little bit mean.

But that's okay.

Wait, wait. What about Mr.

Watsey, and the Watse hump?

Is he still

five months pregnant?

- He's still there and still...

- Farting.

Oh, God, the flashlights.

- What?

- Oh, my God.

Figure it out, dude. Buy

some Gas-X or whatever.

Don Watsey has

a farting problem?

Oh, non-stop.

It's an epidemic.

- It's like a serious problem.

- So toxic.

Hey, who won?

Vince, of course.

He's here.

- Hello, sir.

- Carol's kid, in the flesh.

- Chris Connelly.

- Tom Beasley.

Nice to meet you.

Congrats

on your release.

Thank you very much.

Maybe now

I can get my wife back.

Just joshing you.

Let me get you

a plate.

No, no.

Don't bother.

Oh.

Generally they'd have hot dogs or some tacos,

but they didn't have squat over there.

You were in a car show?

Actually it was

a classic car competition.

My buddy, Vince,

won the big one.

He always does.

Can I be excused?

Sure.

So, how is the job hunt

going?

Pretty good.

Just starting out.

I hear it's pretty tough.

Carol asked me to check in

with the uppers at work,

but we can't hire

any ex-felons.

I appreciate that, sir.

Yeah. Maybe I'll enroll

in some classes.

You know, these days, everybody's

doing their business online.

eBay...

Gregslist...

- So...

- Gregslist? Craigslist.

And nobody knows

who's buying or selling.

Scary as sh*t

if you ask me, but,

in your case it might work

to your advantage.

I don't know.

I think that went well.

Right?

Yeah.

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