One Night Page #3

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- Yes, come on.

- Good luck, have fun.

- Come on, just follow me.

- Have a great night.

- It's, just, please

come with me, look.

- I'm not going

anywhere with you.

- I'm just gonna

walk into traffic.

- Oh, that might be

the smartest thing

that you have done all night.

Go for it, drew!

- Whoa!

- Do it, get hit by a car.

- I'm gonna get hit by a car.

- Do it, I dare you.

- If you don't come, that's it.

- Oh, you're so stupid.

- Yes, bon voyage, life.

- You should really be careful.

- Hey, hey, come on.

It's super cool, let's go.

- Let's go.

- Where?

- Just across the street.

Please come with me.

Please.

- Nice, let's go.

- I'm not running.

- Run, get on my back.

- Hey, drink up.

You're not gonna want

to remember any of this.

- What is this?

- I don't know.

- Stop looking at him.

Okay, he is a trainwreck,

just forget his ass

and come dance with me.

- I have to pee.

- Okay.

- Be back, okay?

- Fine.

- Whoa, where you going,

I thought you were

gonna be my wingman?

- I will, there's just

something I gotta do first.

- You're going to talk

to your girl crush, huh?

- No, it, it's nothing,

never mind.

- Go for it, man.

- Yeah?

- Yeah, come on.

Later.

- I'm using it.

- It's me.

- I said I'm using it.

- I said it's me.

- I'm coming.

What the hell, Andy,

what do you want?

- You're not using it.

What if someone died of

their bladder exploding?

- Well, that's

their problem then.

Hey, did you notice that that

room is like really small

and there are a lot of people,

and there's definitely

less air to breathe?

- Are you gonna, like,

spontaneously combust?

- It's a breathing exercise.

- Can I ask you something?

How come you talk to me like

we didn't ride our bikes

every day when we were eight?

- Because we're

not eight anymore.

- But you're still

the same girl.

- Ha, that's where

you're damn wrong.

You know, Dave

is kind of a loser.

He's got like the IQ

of a fat squirrel.

- Do you have a

problem with him?

- Yeah, he shoved me inside of

my own locker freshman year.

- That never happened.

- Maybe it did, maybe it didn't.

- It didn't.

It didn't.

- The point is, I don't

need some personal tragedy

to tell me that Dave Pierre's

a total douchebag.

- Well, I'm not

dating him anymore,

so it's not like it matters.

- It does matter, though,

because you dated

him at one point.

- Fyi, fat squirrels are

definitely smarter than Dave,

and I would know that

from personal experience.

- That's the Bea I know.

- Shut up.

- We should probably

go back out there.

- You're welcome to go.

- You're welcome to go.

Ladies first.

- You suck, this night.

Just absolutely hard.

- All right, go for it.

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