One for the Money Page #4

for these guns, okay?

No, I can't let you buy me a gun.

Now, Plum, don't flatter yourself.

She won't sell to you. You got no permit.

You're paying me back.

Okay.

Can I keep this?

Hey, I was just about to call you.

You will never believe where I am.

I was just shooting a gun. How hot is that?

- Where are you?

- Sunny's.

Ranger's teaching me how to shoot.

He bought me a gun.

Ranger? What is he, an action figure?

I know, right? But he's helping me

with this whole bounty-hunter thing

so I can nail Morelli.

Well, not "nail" Morelli.

You know what I mean.

- Yeah, I know.

- What?

He skipped bail. He's worth 50 grand.

That's it.

What?

Okay. I just can't tell if you're actually

in this for the money

or if that's just a handy excuse

to chase this guy down.

Yeah, I can see where this is going,

so I'm gonna hang up. I love you.

If I'm looking for Morelli,

I gotta start with his mom.

I don't care if the Pope comes to the house

and beats me with a stick

I will never forgive you. Not ever.

I understand that, Mrs. Morelli,

but Joe missed his court appearance...

You understand nothing.

Wait till you have a child,

and some stunad comes along in a car

and breaks his leg that God gave him.

Then maybe you can stand on my stoop

and tell me you understand.

Okay, but maybe I could just give you

my number, you know and...

A gun? Jesus,

what is this world coming to?

Does your mother know

that you're carrying a gun, Stephanie Plum?

That went well.

The only other person who wants to find

Joe Morelli more than I do...

- Hey, Eddie, what's up?

- ...is my old friend, Eddie Gazarra.

I like the new office.

You're moving up in the world, Eddie.

Good for you.

We both know why you called,

so just get to the point.

The point is, I was on the receiving end

of a baffling phone call,

which I am trying to understand.

Hey! That's going to leave a water mark.

It's laminated, Eddie.

It's like watering a fake plant. Relax.

Maybe I'd relax better...

Would you please get off my desk?

Maybe I'd relax better

if I didn't get a call from my wife.

- Shirley the whiner?

- Hey, hey, hey.

That's my wife and your cousin,

who herself got a call from Lucille Plum.

Vinnie's wife?

You people gotta stop gossiping.

What is wrong with everybody?

What's wrong is we're worried.

You shouldn't be anywhere near

the Morelli thing.

Hey, I have as much right to go after

Morelli as anybody.

You don't know anything about the case.

I know the victim's name is Ziggy Kuleska.

I know he was shot by an off-duty Morelli.

I know the judge posted

bail at half a mill,

and I know Vinnie decided to

put the money up, thinking,

"Joe, he's not gonna screw me."

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