One Fine Day Page #5

your story was turning to sh*t!

You know, Miss Parker,

I don't need to remind you what the Yates

account would be worth to this firm.

- And, by extension, to you.

- No, sir.

Do you know what I think of

when I look at him?

- No.

- A carrier monkey.

He's not a carrier monkey, sir.

He looks like a healthy little...

I'll go find his mother.

Oh my God. What am I gonna do?

I'm really sorry, Mommy.

It's OK, sweetie. It's really not your fault.

It's Maggie's daddy's fault.

Slow down.

- This isn't a very good breakfast, Daddy.

- That's an advantage of being an adult.

You get to act like a kid

any time you feel like it.

Mommy would never let me have

hamburgers for breakfast.

You see what I mean?

- Hello.

- Who's that?

- Who's this?

- Who's this?

What are you doing

with my daughter's phone?

Damn. We must've switched. I'm Jack Taylor.

Our kids are in schooI together.

- "You Don't Know Jack" Taylor?

- That's me.

Oh my God! You're so adorable.

- I love your column.

- Oh, thanks.

- Are you married?

- I'm divorced. What's your name?

- Rita.

- Rita.

Listen, Jack. I've got to go get exfoliated.

- Now, Melanie has your phone, right?

- That's right.

- So what is that number?

- Pennsylvania 3317.

- Pennsylvania. So cute. 3317.

- My dad used to...

Darling, if you speak with her before I do,

would you do me a favor?

Her sister phoned me to see

if I would baby-sit Sammy later on.

But I'm in the middle of my Spring Spa Day

at Elizabeth Arden. I can't cancel now.

But tell her that otherwise

I would have been happy to baby-sit.

No matter what she thinks,

I have forgotten all about Sammy

putting my wedding ring up his nose.

- I'll tell her, Rita.

- You're adorable.

- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

- Hello?

- It's Jack Taylor.

- How did you get this number?

- You're holding my phone.

- This is so typical of you.

- Let's skip the hostilities and do messages.

- Fine.

- Your mother's at a spa day so can't baby-sit.

It's not because she's upset about

Sammy sticking her ring up her nose.

His nose. Thank you. You have

a press conference at five. Goodbye.

Maybe we ought to arrange

to switch our phones back.

Tomorrow when we drop

the kids off at school. On time?

- Fine.

- Fine.

Maggie, when you grow up and you are

incredibly beautiful and intelligent

and possess a certain sweetness

that's like a distant promise

to the brave and to the worthy,

can you please not beat to a pulp every

miserable bastard just because you can?

Can you just not do that?

- OK, Daddy.

- All right.

- Let me help you.

- It's OK. I got it, I got it.

- OK, sweetie. Come on.

- Stupid American woman.

That guy called you stupid.

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