Office Space Page #5

PETER:

Well not all chicks….

LAWRENCE:

Well, the type that double up on a guy like me do.

PETER:

Good point.

LAWRENCE:

NOW, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

PETER:

Besides two chicks at the same time?

LAWRENCE:

Oh yeah.

PETER:

Nothing.

LAWRENCE:

Nothing, huh?

PETER:

I would relax, I would sit on my ass all day, I would do nothing.

LAWRENCE:

You don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my

cousin. He's broke and don't do sh*t.

[Scene Peter's room. He's in bed and he keeps hearing voices.]

NINA:

Corporate payroll, Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate payroll,

Nina speaking. Just a moment. Corporate payroll, Nina speaking. Just a

moment.

Peter buries his head in his pillow.

[Scene The staff meeting. Peter's watch reads Friday 12, 10:37.

Everyone's standing outside their cubicles. There's a banner that says

"Is This Good for the COMPANY?"]

BILL:

So you should ask yourself, with every decision that you make (points

to the banner) Is this good for the company? Am I helping the best way

that I can for the company...

PETER:

Is that the guy?

TOM:

Yeah...

BILL:

Good. Well, uh, I'd like to, uh, welcome a new member to our team. Uh,

Bob Slydell. Yeah. Uh, he is, uh, a consultant. Yeah. He is a

consultant. (Tom shakes his head) He'll be helping us out a little

here, asking some questions, making sure things go a little more

smoothly. Yeah. Oh and remember, next Friday is Hawaiian shirt day! So,

y'know, if you want to, go ahead and uh, wear a Hawaiian shirt and

jeans.

[Scene Milton's cubicle, under the banner. He's on the phone with

Peter.]

MILTON:

I, I don't care if they, if they lay me off either, because I, I told

Bill that if he moves my desk one more time, then, then I'm quitting.

I'm going to quit. And I told Dom too because they've moved my desk

four times. I used to be by the window, where I could see the squirrels

and they were merry. But then they switched from the Swingline to the

Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline. (he's holding his red

Swingline) (Camera pans to Peter) They have my staples for the Boston

and I kept the staples from the Swingline stapler.

PETER:

Ok, Milton.

MILTON:

And if, if they take my stapler, I will, I will set this building on

fire.

PETER:

Oh, that's great. I will talk to you later.

He hangs up and looks at his watch

4:
45. Peter looks around and sees Bill. He ducks and peeks to see Bill

talking with some workers. He quickly tries to save his files, but the

computer is slower than he'd like. Bill is talking to other guys.

PETER:

Oh, come on! (it finished saving, but starts to save another file) Oh,

for crying out -!

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