Not Easily Broken

When I first met Clarice in college,

I was completely sprung.

She was smart, passionate, driven.

The sweetest thing Id ever met.

You know the kind of woman

Im talking about, right?

The got-your-back kind of woman?

I did what a good man does

when he finds the woman...

...he's been dreaming about

his whole life.

I went all the way.

For if one falls down,

the other is there to pick him up.

That's right.

Even better

is a cord of three strands...

...because it is not easily broken.

My brother, my sister,

life is going to try to knock you down.

Amen.

And it's hard to keep

the good in a good marriage...

...when bad things happen.

The two of you represents

the first two strands.

But God represents the third.

And as long as you stay

close to him...

...your marriage

will be a three-stranded cord...

...this world can never break.

- I love you.

- I love you.

Congregation,

Mr. And Mrs. David Johnson.

On our wedding night...

...it was just the two of us

in a little slice of heaven.

We didn't come up for air

for two days.

Together,

we had goals and dreams.

We were going places in this world.

She was gonna be

a real-estate rainmaker.

I was gonna be

a major-league ball player...

...with hall-of-fame numbers,

a big contract...

...an entrepreneur, daddy.

The big life.

Till it all ended shattering my leg

sliding into home plate...

...during the final game

of my rookie season.

Yeah, that's how young love

always starts out.

Feels like the honeymoon

will last forever.

But like the bishop said...

...life has a way

of knocking the hell out of you.

- Oh, hey, baby, sorry I'm late.

- Hey, baby.

There was this bumper-to-bumper

traffic on the 5.

- It's okay.

- But look at you.

Look at you in my little favorite,

sexy, big, grown-girl outfit.

Oh, no, baby,

I just touched my face up.

Can't go there.

All right.

- This is it.

- What's that?

This new property

I've been dying to show.

I think I'm gonna get

an offer on it soon.

- When are you showing it?

- Tonight.

- Oh, baby, not tonight.

- Why?

You know, I thought we could get

a little quality time, you know?

Oh, God, Dave,

I would love to spend quality time.

But, you know,

my commissions pay for this house.

And besides, these clients could pay

for that new work truck...

...we've been dying to get you.

You think I want

my big, strong, chocolate kiss...

...driving around

in that beat-up old thing?

David, you're building

a business, okay?

And appearance is everything.

It's about time we put the pro back...

...in Dave's All Pro

Building and Remodeling.

Appearance is everything,

that's what you said?

I'm saying, you can't show up

to someone's house...

...talking about you're here

to remodel and rebuild...

...in that beat-up old rusty truck.

- I happen to like that truck with rust.

- It's a bucket.

- The rust, everything, I like that truck.

- Okay, okay, okay.

What about this weekend,

you and I close ourselves in...

...and try out that new Jacuzzi tub

we bought?

I like that idea.

- But it has to be after Saturday.

- Why?

I'm meeting the boys

and team on Saturday.

- The boys?

- But...

But after that... After that, it can then

be just you and me, and me and you.

And then we could talk

about little miniature you and mes.

Oh, God, please.

Don't press your luck.

And there goes our quality time,

so that's on you, brother.

- Are you gonna hoop later?

- Yeah, meet Brock and Tree about 7.

Good, good, you know, because I feel

a little extra around the middle section.

- You ain't feeling...

- Yes, I do, baby.

I'm feeling a little spare tire.

Get your hoops on tonight.

- For... For real, you feel...

- Yeah.

- You don't... You...

- I'll see you later, okay?

Good morning.

You've been holding out on me,

Clarice.

- What?

- You didn't tell me you was...

...taking Oprah and Stedman

out to look at houses.

Oh, hush, girl,

that's Mr. And Mrs. Reid.

He's a federal judge

and she's a chichi art dealer.

They're looking to get

into a new zip code.

Well, you are already

Salesperson of the Year.

How come you can't throw

your girl charity...

...and help me meet

my quota for the month?

Because, sister girl, that's not how

I got to be Salesperson of the Year.

When you live the life,

you pay the price.

And these bills

are about to strangle me.

What about Dave?

Go make that money, girl.

Sorry I asked.

Hey, Eminem, Eminem,

you wanna turn that down a little bit?

Sorry, man.

Give my neighbors a heart attack.

You guys think I'm getting fat?

- You what?

- What did you say?

Yeah, Reesie says

it looks like I'm gaining weight.

If she's says it's your ass, yes.

Yes, your ass did get bigger.

Not looking at my ass, are you?

If I am looking at your ass right now,

I got good reason to.

Since Vanessa got pregnant,

she won't let me see her naked.

So ass is an ass right now.

I can't wait to play ball today.

I'm giving everybody a good play.

Speaking of big asses,

how did that disposition thing go...

...with your divorce attorney?

- You mean, deposition, Tree?

- Depo... That's what I said.

- Yeah, right.

- What did I say?

- You said disposition.

- All right, I'm sorry, human thesaurus.

- How did your deposition go?

- Oh, man, it's ridiculous.

I'm a dead man.

Fiona's gonna try to take everything.

My house, this car, half my salary.

That is ridiculous, man.

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