Night Train Page #3

Oh, thank heavens for that.

There we go, my clever little boy.

Oh!

How are you and Poochie doing?

Well, between you and me,

we are suffering from a bit of gas,

but we're still going

to have our midnight meal.

Oh, good heavens!

- What's he doing in my car?

- I guess he wanted to take a nap.

Yes, but he certainly does

look dead to the world.

A bit too much

holiday cheer, I'm afraid.

Oh, dear, that's why I left

my second husband Alfred.

He was having too much

holiday cheer seven days a week.

Poochie! Poochie! Poochie!

All right, stop!

Poochie!

Leave the poor old souse alone.

Would you like to switch cars,

Ma'am?

Well, perhaps I'd better.

Poochie certainly

doesn't care for him,

and I really trust

his taste in people.

I'll get your things.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

- Yeah. Call me Miles.

Okay.

How much time do we have?

This one's the biggest.

Incoming!

Take it away.

Miles...

...tell me you have

a bigger trunk than this.

No.

What?

- No.

- No?

No!

You said that he was gonna fit

into something.

That's why we brought him

all the way back here!

I said there was

luggage in the back.

Maybe it was unloaded

five stops ago!

- I don't know.

- Well, you know all...

You know all the train routes

down to the second,

but you can't seem to figure this out!

Hey, packing dead bodies

was not part of my job training!

This is ridiculous.

- Dammit!

It's not gonna work.

Okay. All right, sorry.

I'm sorry. New plan.

New plan.

When we arrive at the next station,

I'm gonna take him off myself.

All right? Yeah!

Yeah!

I'm gonna put his arm

around my shoulder.

I'm gonna just walk him out

like he's drunk, like he's my buddy.

And I'm gonna take him off

into the woods or...

...by the garbage dump, or...

Excuse me.

It's staff only in here.

I was just looking for a wash cloth.

A wash cloth?

Really, my lenses are dirty.

Thanks.

Hey, if she doesn't come back,

does that mean she loses her share?

- We're taking him back to his seat.

- What?

Yeah, we are going to forget

this madness ever...

- Sorry it took me so long.

- Yeah.

I had to leave the kitchen car

with some gopher.

Wait. What were you doing?

Well...

- Improvising.

- What, what, what?

Gonna be quick, all right?

We have approximately 7 minutes

before we cross the bridge, all right?

- Okay.

- Hey!

Hey, stop!

What's wrong, Miles?

- What's wrong?

- This is what we have to do.

You're about to carve into that fellow

like he's a Christmas turkey.

I took an autopsy class

last semester.

I know exactly

where to make the incisions.

You're not thinking straight, Miss.

You've got to clear your head.

My head's never been more clear.

Hey, put down that knife.

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